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A/N Thank you so much for the fic of the week on Spuffy Realm for Guilty Pleasures! It means a lot to me that so many people voted for it (and my other fics)! This chapter has taken a slightly darker turn (think season 6). Thanks for reading and please review!





Chapter 15


Buffy walked into her house feeling emotionally drained as she headed up the
stairs to her room. Closing her bedroom door behind her, Buffy leaned
against it, letting the tears spill down her cheeks as her hands covered her
face before running through her hair.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when she sensed his presence. She had
been too distracted with her emotions, but now her eyes snapped open,
adjusting to the dark room. She felt her breathing speed up when she saw
him sitting on her bed, his hands clasped in front of him as he watched her
in the dim light.

“Buffy-“

“What the hell are you doing here?” she asked in a low tone, setting her jaw
in preparation of what was to come.

Spike stood up, about to respond, when Buffy crossed the room, letting her
fist fly into his nose. Spike immediately backhanded her, more out of
reflex than necessity. Buffy reeled back, her hand coming up to her jaw as
she looked at him in surprise.

Spike’s eyes widened. “Buffy, I didn’t-“

His words were immediately cut off as Buffy kicked him in the stomach and
threw another punch at his jaw. Spike grabbed her shoulders, throwing her
into the door and covering her body with his, repressing any further
movements from her.

“Stop it,” he growled before his lips crashed down on hers.

Buffy resisted for a brief moment before kissing him back, battling his
mouth with hers. A new fight was created with their teeth and tongues.
Spike’s hands went to the waist of her jeans, practically ripping the pants
and her panties away from her body. Buffy pulled back for a brief moment,
before pushing him onto the floor and straddling him.

Spike stared at the woman above him. Her chest heaving as she panted for
air, her hair spilling around her shoulders as she stared into his eyes.
Buffy grabbed his shirt, ripping it open and letting the buttons fly
everywhere, while whipping off her own shirt and bra.

Spike felt his eyes flash amber as he watched her run her fingernails down his chest
leaving deep scratches and reaching to unbutton his pants, jerking them down his hips.
For good measure, Buffy threw another punch at his face, gasping when
Spike rolled them and entered her in one swift movement, not giving her time
to adjust as he plunged into her.

Buffy began to gasp and moan, trying not to get lost in the sensations. She
was rapidly losing the battle of wills before Angelus’ voice entered her
subconscious. *They were in love for over one hundred years. I’ve never
seen a man more devoted to a woman.*

Tears built up in her eyes as Spike’s words haunted her.

*It’s not that easy for a vampire to fall in love, kitten.*

Angelus seemed to overlap her memory, blurring with Spike’s voice. *He
loved her from the beginning. Dru just brought him home one night, and he
was whipped from that point on.*

Buffy’s tears finally spilled over as she slapped Spike.

“I hate you.”

Spike seemed surprised for a brief moment before his calm mask fell back
into place.

“I hate you!” Buffy screamed, pounding on his chest.

“I know,” Spike said quietly, never stopping his movements and noticing that
Buffy’s hips were still rising off the ground to meet his thrusts.

“I hate you,” she whispered. Spike noticed it sounded more like ‘I love
you’ but didn’t say anything.

Tears continued to stream down her cheeks as he plunged into her. “I hate
you,” she whispered again, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him
closer to her. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you…”

Spike held her, kissing along her shoulder and neck, realizing that she
wasn’t tensing up from having him so close to her. He continued his
movements and soothing gestures as she cried and weakly pounded her fists
against him. He squeezed his eyes shut, knowing that she was too
overwrought with emotions that she didn’t know what to do.

Buffy could feel her heart racing as they violently thrust against each
other. Spike felt her body trembling beneath him. He thought it was her
quiet sobs at first, but soon realized that she was seeking her climax. He
pushed into her with renewed vigor, sending her over the edge with a
strangled cry.

Spike closed himself off to everything. His emotions, the demon…her.
Seconds later, he was following her over the edge but was so detached from
the situation there was no danger of his demon coming out. This was an act
of release, not intimacy…for both of them.

Buffy’s walls were still fluttering around him when she shoved him away,
climbing to her feet. Spike watched as she searched through her wardrobe,
pulling out fresh clothes and quickly dressing as he buttoned his
jeans. Spike looked up and saw her putting on her shoes.

“Look, pet, I know you’re mad about the girl, and I’m...”

Spike stopped when Buffy’s eyes snapped up to his, confusion etched on her
features.

“The…oh my God,” she murmured, her hand coming up to cover her mouth as
fresh tears slipped free. She had completely forgotten about the dead girl
in the factory. She was too consumed with jealousy and hatred and something
else that she really didn’t want to identify to remember what had occurred
earlier in the day.

Spike took a step forward, tilting his head in uncertainty. “You didn’t
remember?”

Buffy turned away from him, biting her lip as she tried to push down the
anguish inside of her. She had just screwed a soulless demon who she was
sworn to kill. Spike slipped behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist
and preparing for the blow that never came.

“Then what’s wrong?” he asked, not surprised when Buffy pulled away from
him. She slowly turned around to look him in the eyes before speaking.

“Were you ever going to tell me about Drusilla?”

Spike’s eyes widened as his body froze.





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