By Heather Martin

Spoilers- Set during and after Smashed. I borrowed a few lines from Wrecked as well. Has spoilers for everything up to that point. Goes AU after that

Summary- B/S T/W A/X Something goes funky with Spike and Buffy after their coupling in the abandoned house. Meanwhile, a demon and a mysterious girl come to Sunnydale from the future.

Chapter Eleven- Seeking Help

It felt weird for Buffy to be back amongst the Sunnydale dorm rooms. It was only a year ago that she had actually lived in one. Instead, it felt like an eternity ago. She wasn’t that unsure Freshman straight out of college anymore. She had been through a lot. She was old. Not physically, but mentally.

She took a hand and rapped on the door before her. There wasn’t an immediate response. Thoughts that the owner must not be home washed over her. She needed this person to be there.

The door opened. Tara stood there wearing a skirt and peasant top. She smiled when she saw Buffy.

“Buffy. I wasn’t expecting you,” she greeted.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call,” Buffy apologized.

“No, no, that’s all right. Come in.” Tara held the door open for the slayer.

They went over to the bed and sat down.

“It is nice to see you,” Tara told her.

“Yeah. Dawn misses you. We both wish you’d come by more often.”

“M-Maybe we should get together and do something.”

“That’d be great.”

There was a span of silence. Buffy reached into her jeans pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. She gave it to Tara.

“Do you think you could do this spell? I mean, it isn’t dangerous is it?”

Tara looked over the spell. When she was done, her eyes shifted to Buffy with surprise.

“This is a time travel incantation,” Tara stated in amazement.

Buffy proceeded to tell her about Alexis. She filled her in about why she was there and how she knew them all from the future.

“I didn’t know time travel was a real thing,” the witch mutter, still in shock.

“Neither did I,” replied Buffy. “But Alexis knows things. Things she could only know if she knew us personally.”

Tara glanced over the spell once more. “The spell sounds easy enough. I don’t think anything bad can happen when performing it. But I’ve never done anything like this before. I can’t guarantee it will work.”

“You can try, though, right?”

“I can try. There is no harm in that.”

“Thanks. And I’m sure Alexis is grateful too.”

They sat there not know what to say for a moment.

Buffy built up enough courage to go on. The spell wasn’t the main reason she was there. Sure that was important, but it wasn’t what was occupying Buffy’s mind.

“This isn’t the only reason I came here,” said Buffy. “I need to talk to you.”

“What is it, Buffy? Has Willow . . .?”

“No,” interrupted Buffy. “It isn’t Will. She’s been doing good with the cut-down on magic thing. You’d be proud of her. No, this is something else.”

“Good. That’s . . . good. So, what do you want to talk about then?”

This was where the hard part came in. How should Buffy start? ‘Oh, I’ve been knocked up by Spike. What should I do?’ That wouldn’t work.

“It’s about . . . It’s about Spike,” Buffy managed to get out.

Perplexity came over Tara. “Spike? Is he having problems with the humanity issue? I thought he was getting better about that.”

The slayer shook her head. “No, not about that. It’s about . . .” She swallowed. “About Spike and . . . me.”

“You? I’m confused.”

“He could hurt me, Tara. Before he became human.”

Tara gasped. “His chip wasn’t working!?”

“No, it still worked. It just didn’t react to me. I want you to check out that spell that brought me back. I need to know if . . . I’d ask Willow, but . . .” Her voice wavered.

Tara took a hand and placed it on Buffy’s arm. “You think it’s you?”

“I don’t know. I feel different. There are things I’ve done . . . I think I came back wrong.”

Firmly, Tara said, “No. That’s n-not . . . No. You didn’t.”

“Can you please check anyways? Just to make sure?”

Tara saw the pleading in Buffy’s expression. The woman was lost, begging for help. She nodded.

***********************

Buffy went through the whole day without throwing up. That is, until evening rolled around. She just never could keep supper down.

She flushed the toilet, washed her face, and brushed her teeth. Afterward, she stared at herself in the mirror. She didn’t recognize who she was anymore. Was she the person that dove off the tower to save the world out of love? Or was she the cold, unfeeling, creature that used men who cared about her?

“How are you?”

Buffy turned around to see Alexis. She had forgotten that the girl was there. Willow and Dawn were out, and it had slipped her mind that someone else occupied the house.

“I’m . . . still pregnant,” Buffy answered, hollowly.

Alexis leaned against the doorframe. “And you what, thought it would go away after a good night’s rest? Like it was some kind of illness or something?”

“It sure feels like an illness!” Buffy threw back.

“Morning sickness is only temporary.”

“I went to the doctor today.”

“Good. How’d that go?”

“It was bad. I hate doctors. And I have to go again next month,” Buffy told her.

Alexis chuckled. “I know. When you . . .” She stopped herself.

“What?” Buffy asked.

“N-Nothing. Nothing important. I just know. That you hate doctors.”

Buffy frowned.

“He told me I’m two months and a half along.” She shut her eyes. “God. It must have happened the first time Spike and I . . .”

Buffy’s eyes shot open. She studied Alexis. “That was when Spike became human.”

Standing up straight, Alexis opened her mouth, but didn’t say anything.

“You are all knowledge girl. Why did Spike become human?” Buffy demanded.

“I-I don’t know,” Alexis stammered.

Buffy took a step forward. “You must know.” She touched her stomach with both hands. “Does it have something to do with the baby?”

“I don’t know!” insisted Alexis.

The slayer grabbed her arm roughly. “Tell me! I need to know! Is this baby special? Did Spike change because of it?”

Alexis snatched her arm back. “I don’t know!” she yelled.

Buffy looked shaken. She stood there, breathing in deeply.

“I don’t know.” This time the teen spoke gently. “You never figured it out.”

“So Spike turned human for no reason?” Buffy questioned, doubtfully.

“I . . . “

“And this baby isn’t special? It just happened because I decided to fuck my brains out with my enemy?”

Tears stung Alexis’s eyes. She looked away. “I don’t know.” Then she left.

**********************

Alexis ran outside. She ended up in the backyard. She sat down on the grass and sobbed.

She had been so close to spilling it all. She had wanted to tell Buffy the truth so bad. And afterwards, she wanted Buffy to hug her and be the Buffy she knew. This Buffy was someone she had never seen before.

How could this Buffy treat her baby like a virus? Buffy’s daughter was a miracle. It shouldn’t be a mistake Buffy wanted to throw away. No, she knew Buffy loved her daughter. She knew it. She’d seen it years from now.

Alexis told herself this as she cried.

***********************

Alexis stepped into the Magic Box. It was busy which usually didn’t happen unless there was a sale.

She walked over to the register. Anya got done ringing up a customer.

“Where is Spike?” Alexis asked.

“Oh, I gave him the day off. He had a date or something. The day I really need him too. Look at all these people.” Anya swept her arm around the store. “Isn’t it fabulous!? I love the life of commerce.”

“A-A date?”

Anya nodded. “Yeah. Some Mandy. Mindy. Something like that.”

Another customer came up to the counter. They put down a Tarot deck.

“These tarot cards are selling like hot cakes. I’m so glad I ordered them,” Anya said, beaming.

Alexis turned. She headed out the door. She went over to the curb and sat down.

What was wrong with this time? Giles had told her not to interrupt the order of things. Well, things didn’t seem to be in any order at all. The way things were going, she didn’t see how they could result in the future she belonged to.

____________________________________________

Aren’t you just dying to know what the future is like? Oh, and there is a reason that Spike turned human. And yes, I will tell you. Later.