By Heather Martin

Spoilers- Set during and after Smashed. I borrowed a few lines from Wrecked as well. Has spoilers for everything up to that point. Goes AU after that

Summary- B/S T/W A/X Something goes funky with Spike and Buffy after their coupling in the abandoned house. Meanwhile, a demon and a mysterious girl come to Sunnydale from the future.

Chapter Thirteen- Confessions

The house was entirely silent. Dawn was at school. Willow was at college. Alexis was somewhere . . . other than there. Buffy was alone. It seemed like she was that way a lot lately. But then again, on second thought, she wasn’t really by herself ever anymore.

Sitting on the couch, Buffy let her hand roam to her middle. It was amazing when you actually comprehended it all. There was something inside her. Something alive and growing. So small that it wasn’t noticeable yet. But it was there all the same. The notion was petrifying and wondrous all at the same time.

She suddenly felt as if a veil of sunlight had materialized from the shadows. It bathed her in warmth, melting away some of the coldness. A few tears of relief streamed down her face. And she understood something for the first time. She loved this baby. No matter how it came to be. She loved it despite who its father was. She must not be completely consumed by death if she could still love.

The doorbell rang, making her jump. She got up and went to answer it. She opened the door, peering out. It took a moment for her to process the sight in front of her. When she did, she wrapped her arms around the older man.

Giles hugged the girl back. “Buffy,” he murmured. After a long embrace, she let him inside.

They settled on the sofa. There was a silence. Finally, Buffy said,” I missed you.”

A smile came to his lips. “And I have you. Leaving was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”

Buffy’s gaze fell to the floor. “I hope you don’t think my calling you back is weak of me,” she whispered.

He laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Not at all. Whatever it is, it must be important.”

Buffy turned her head to face him. Her face showed great pain. “You’re going to be so disappointed in me. I really let you down.”

“Buffy, what‘s happened here?” he asked.

She took a deep breath. “Willow’s been abusing her magic. She almost let Amy take her to an evil warlock. Spike’s human. A girl named Alexis has come from the future. She informed me that some demon from her time period is after me. And . . . I’ve been sleeping with Spike.”

The slayer looked away, embarrassed. She heard something she never would have anticipated. Giles was laughing. She slowly looked back over. He was covering his mouth, trying to stop.

“Terribly sorry,” he apologized. His laughter didn’t cease, however.

Buffy stared at him. Her eyes began to sting. She fought to quell the need to break down. She couldn’t understand why her ex-watcher was acting this way. Didn’t he care?

Seeing Buffy’s distress, Giles instantly stopped his outburst. Shame came over his expression. “Things must be difficult for you. I’m sorry I laughed. It’s just your speech sounded so unreal.”

“I really screwed up,” she whispered.

“Sleeping with Spike is a mistake. But you are an adult and are entitled to make some. I can‘t pass judgment. And he‘s human you say?,” he commented.

“I’m pregnant,” she managed to get out. She couldn’t meet his eyes.

Of all the things Giles had been prepared for this was not it. Shock hit him with great intensity. He swallowed, wondering what to do. He had never been in a situation like this. He saw a young woman needing someone to take care of her. That should be the father’s job. Where the hell was he?

“B-By Spike? Where is he?” Giles demanded.

Shimmering green eyes met his. “I haven’t told him yet,” she confessed. “Tara is the only one besides you to know.”

His gaze was severe. “How could you be so irresponsible!?”

Buffy wished he’d go back to the laughing. That was better than this.

“There are means of protection,” Giles said.

“I know. But he was a vampire, Giles. He changed while we . . . we were . . .”

Giles reached for his glasses. He removed them to begin his ritual of cleaning. He wiped the lenses on his shirt.

“This is a rather peculiar situation,” he said, while replacing his eyewear. “I’m afraid they didn’t cover this in watcher training. Pregnancy in slayers is quite a rare occurrence.”

“But it has happened before?” Buffy questioned.

“Y-yes, I believe so. I’ll have to check my journals.”

“Could you research Spike’s humanity as well?”

“Of course. It happened while you were . . .?” He let out a cough, not being able to continue.

“Yes. Alexis, the time travel visitor, told me that his change had nothing to do with my pregnancy. But I think she might be lying.”

Giles nodded. “If there is anything to find, I will,” he assured her.

Buffy reached out and hugged him. “Thank-you.” She sniffled. “Can you ever forgive me?”

Her sergeant father held her back. “Oh, Buffy. I never should have left you.”

She continued to cry, savoring the contact. Maybe things wouldn’t be all right, but maybe they could be better.

**************************

“Mmmm,” Mindy moaned, while kissing Spike.

Spike could barely take it. Mindy had her tongue shoved down his throat, almost choking him.

He felt hands lift up his shirt. Sharp nails scraped his stomach. He shoved them away, stepping back.

“Mindy,” Spike said, “I can’t.”

“Why? Is there something wrong with me?” his date inquired, worriedly.

“No. I just . . . I love someone else. I thought I was ready to move on, but I’m not.” He sighed. “I’m sorry.”

She nodded. “So am I,” she told him.

So, that was the end of Mindy and Spike. Not that there really had been a Mindy and Spike to begin with.

Spike walked home, lost in his thoughts. This human thing sucked. You couldn’t just exist. No, you had choices to make. And each one had a consequence. It was a gamble rather it turned out good or bad.

He came home to find his door ajar. Alarm came over him. He had left his apartment locked. Thinking it must be a burglar (even though he couldn’t understand why someone would want to steal from his meager possessions), he prepared himself to fight. As he had told Buffy before, he may not have the strength, but he certainly still had skill.

Spike burst inside, scanning the place. His eyes fell on Buffy. She was on the couch, as if it was perfectly normal for her to be there.

“What are you doing here? Did you kick my door in again!?” he shouted.

She stood up, crossing her arms. “Where the hell have you been?”

“None of your bloody business, slayer. Now, how’d you get in?”

“I-I kicked the door in. Sorry, but I really needed to get in. Now, tell me, where have you been? I’ve been waiting for almost two hours.”

“I had a date,” he threw out. Satisfaction filled him from the words.

“A date? With who?”

“Mindy. We went out for dinner. You know, that new Italian place?”

Buffy plopped back down on the couch. “Mindy, huh? Well, you can’t see her anymore.”

Anger spread over him. How dare she tell him what to do!

“And why the hell not!?” Spike demanded.

“Because I’m pregnant!” she yelled back.

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I’m evil. Yep, I’m leaving off there.