By Heather Martin

Spoilers- Set during and after Smashed. I borrowed a few lines from Wrecked as well. Has spoilers for everything up to that point. Goes AU after that

Summary- B/S T/W A/X Something goes funky with Spike and Buffy after their coupling in the abandoned house. Meanwhile, a demon and a mysterious girl come to Sunnydale from the future.

Chapter Seventeen- Decisions

Xander walked into his apartment to find it dark. This was unusual. Anya was known to wait up for him before going to bed. He groped his way through the place, heading into the bedroom. The window let in a subtle amount of moonlight, just enough for him to make out his fiancé’s form curled up under the covers.

“Ahn?”

He sat down on the mattress beside her. He took a gentle hand and touched her back.

Turning over, Anya faced him. He couldn’t see her expression in the shadows.

“Are you all right?” he asked.

“Tired,” she murmured.

Letting out a sigh of relief, he said, “So, you’re not mad then.”

“Not at you.” She rose up to a sitting position. “How dare Buffy announce that she is having a baby.”

“I take it you aren’t on the ‘I love Spike bandwagon’ either?”

“That’s not it. Spike is a very good asset to my business. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Buffy can’t have a little person now,” Anya complained.

Confusion spread over Xander. He ran his fingers through his hair. “Not sure I’m following you, Ahn. Why are you upset with Buffy if it isn‘t about her boyfriend?”

All of a sudden Anya turned on the lamp. Xander blinked, his eyes adjusting to it.

The blonde woman grabbed his arm. “Let’s get married soon. Not a couple months from now. Like, in a couple weeks.” Her voice was pleading.

“Why the change in topic? I thought we were talking about Buffy here,” Xander stated.

She let go of his arm. “I don’t care about Buffy. I want to talk about us and our ceremony of eternal love.”

This wasn’t how Xander wanted to discuss their wedding. He had been meaning to bring up the subject, but not when she was in a state of distress.

Xander got to his feet. “About that . . .” His gaze met hers. “Anya, I love you with all my heart. You know that, right?”

A bright smile came to her lips. “I love you too.”

“But . . .” He took in a deep breath. “I think we should wait.” There, he had said it.

She gaped at him.

“I’m not ready yet. I should have told you this sooner, but . . .”

Anya jumped out of bed. “Yes, you should have told me this sooner, Xander Harris!” In a frenzy, she began to take off her nightgown and put on regular clothes.

“Anya, what are you doing?” he asked with concern.

“First Buffy has to announce she’s pregnant and now. . .” She looked over at him with pain in her eyes. “I can’t believe you are breaking up with me!”

“Breaking up?” He shook his head. “I’m not breaking up with you.”

“But you don’t want to get married.”

“I do. Just not right away.”

She buttoned her jeans, now fully dressed. Then she walked briskly out of the room. Xander followed. He snatched her arm.

“Where are you going?” he demanded.

“I don’t know!” she threw back.

Anya thrust her arm back. She reached for the doorknob.

“Please don’t go, Ahn. I love you,” he begged.

She hesitated.

“I’d rather marry you this second than have you walk out of my life forever,” Xander declared.

Anya spun around. Her eyes glimmered with wetness. “Really?”

“If that is what it takes.”

She stepped up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She buried her face in his shoulder, soaking his gray shirt with salty tears. He stroked her hair with tenderness.

“I never want to be without you,” Xander said. “I’d be content if it was just the two of us forever.”

Anya lifted her head. “What about three?”

“What?”

******************************

Giles had his watcher diary open, a black pen in his hand.

“All right, so you are from fifteen years in the future?” he questioned.

“Yes,” Alexis answered. -

They were at the Magic Box. Anya hadn’t come in that morning, which greatly worried him. She was always there an hour before opening. Luckily he had a key to the place.

“And the Gestalt demon is also from your time?”

Again, she confirmed his question. He jotted the information down.

“Buffy and I sent you here to prevent the demon from killing the Buffy here? Which, in result would cause yourself to perish and never be able to cleanse the future?”

“Pretty much, yeah.”

He looked up. “Now, about Spike’s condition. He . . .”

Just then the bell over the door tinkled. Giles slammed his diary closed. They shifted their attention to see who entered. Buffy came in. She was wearing black pants and a white v-neck top. Her hair was up in a cute twist.

“Hey, guys,” Buffy greeted. She glanced around. “Where’s Anya?”

“She never showed up,” Alexis announced.

The slayer frowned. “I hope it doesn’t have anything to do with last night. She seemed pretty upset.”

“Really, about what?” Giles inquired.

Buffy shrugged. “I’m not sure. My confession was what set her off.”

Alexis squirmed in her seat.

“Interesting,” muttered Giles.

“I just hope she’s all right. Maybe we should call.”

“A splendid idea, Buffy. I’ll do just that.” He got up to fetch the phone.

“Wait, uh, Giles, about the research. Anything new?”

“Sorry, no,” he lied. “But I will keep looking.”

He went over to the phone and grabbed it. He punched in the numbers to Xander and Anya’s apartment. After several rings he hung up.

Giles turned back. “I’m afraid no one is home.”

*******************************

Buffy dug her hand into the bowl that teetered on her lap. She put the buttery popcorn into her mouth. She was rather enjoying herself. An old classic romance movie was on AMC. It was pretty good. And what was even better was that she was lacking the nausea that had accompanied the past month.

The movie ended with the man and woman kissing after agreeing to get married. How sweet, she thought.

There was a knock at the door. Buffy got up and went to answer it. As she swung open the door, she saw Spike standing on the other side. He gave her a smile.

“Hullo, luv.”

“Hi, Spike. Come in,” she greeted.

She went over and picked up the remote. She pressed the off button and the television went black.

Buffy plopped back down on the couch. She munched on some more popcorn.

“How was the conversation with Harris?” Spike asked.

She frowned. “Not good, but I knew that it wouldn’t be.”

He nodded.

Nervous, Spike took something out of his duster. “I uh. . . have something for you.”

The slayer sat up straighter. “Ooo, prezzies,” she squealed. “And it isn’t even Christmas or my Birthday.”

Her good mood caught him off guard. It wasn’t often she treated him like someone she wanted around.

Spike handed her something square. She took it, realizing that it was a book. Her excitement faded. She wasn’t much for reading. Then she took in the cover. It had a mother holding a baby on the front.

Spike combed a hand through his hair. He seemed embarrassed. “I thought it might help. It tells what to expect and all.”

A genuine smile came to her face. “Thank-you, Spike. I hadn’t even thought about getting a pregnancy book.”

He pointed to the book. “That one pretty much has everything in it.”

She lifted an eyebrow. “You read it?”

“Well, yeah.”

She giggled.

“Hey, I am literate, ya know. And I wanted to know what is going on with the itzy bitzy,” he defended.

She quenched her laughter. “I’m not making fun of you. I think it’s cute.”

A smirk made it’s way to his lips. “Cute, huh? You think I’m cute?”

“Hey!” she protested. “I said what you did was cute, not that you were cute.”

“Same thing, pet. You are what you do.”

“Whatever.”

Buffy stifled a yawn. This didn’t go unnoticed by Spike.

“Right then, I think I better go. Let me know what ya think of the book,” Spike said.

Buffy reached for his hand. “Wait!”

He turned back to face her. “What is it, slayer?”

There was a softness in her eyes that he had never seen in them before.

“Will you stay with me?” she questioned.

“I told you that I’d never deny you. If you really . . .”

She shook her head, interrupting him. “Not like that, Spike. Stay with me tonight. H-Hold me.”

His eyes widened in surprise.

A while later the two were lying comfortably in Buffy’s bed. She was propped against Spike, his arm around her. She drifted off to sleep, feeling warm and content.

***********************

Buffy awoke during the night to feel something rubbing against her belly. Her pajama shirt was lifted, and something was touching her on her bare skin. Her groggy mind came to awareness that it was a hand. Spike’s hand to be exact. He was by the side of the bed, on his knees.

“Hullo, itty bitty, it’s daddy,” he whispered tenderly.

Buffy felt her heart swell. Oh God. He had been right. He was cute.

“Your mum says you’re going to be a little girl. I can just imagine how beautiful you are going to be. You’re going to look just like your mum, you are.”

The way he was talking so sweetly. . . He really loves us, Buffy thought.

“I wish I could give you a right perfect family,” Spike went on. “One where both parents loved each other. I don’t think that’ll ever happen, though. But that doesn’t mean your mum and I don’t love you. We’re going to take good care of you. I’m never going to leave either of you. I’m not like that bloody poof or captain cardboard.”

Buffy felt Spike press his lips to her stomach. “I love you,” he muttered.

He stood up. She kept her eyes shut, feigning slumber. He bent down and kissed her forehead as well. “And I love you.”

A moment later, Spike got back in bed. She risked a glance over at him a short time later. He was asleep, or close to it.

Buffy’s eyes burned with tears. They streamed down her face. She reached out and stroked Spike’s hollow cheek. Poor Spike.

Right then, for the first time, Buffy wished with all her heart that she could love Spike back. Not only for the sake of her baby and Spike, but also for herself.

_________________________________________________

HA! I gave you a tiny bit of Spuffy! I am not a total angst queen.