Never Alone by Lilachigh
Chapter 6 - Just a dream
Very short linking chapter to the next big part for those of you who love this story. Thank you, too, for all the great reviews. Much appreciated.
She was brushing her teeth when she knew. How prosaic was that - a mouthful of foam, hair screwed up on top of her head, just about to get under the dribble of water that the Italians called a shower before heading out to a nightclub. Not looking Buffy best, but then, there was no one to see her in the Italian apartment.
Dawn was on holiday from school, back in England for a swift visit to see Giles. They’d got really close recently, and Buffy was pleased. Junior Watcher, Dawn called herself, laughing, but Buffy had the feeling that was far closer to the truth than the younger girl knew.
She was absorbing knowledge from Giles at an incredible rate and gave orders to the new Slayers with ease and confidence and tact. It wasn’t the life that Buffy would have chosen for her, but she couldn’t deny she was good at it.
So Buffy was alone in Rome, getting ready for a night out with new friends. Then, deep inside her she felt this - it was a strange sort of tug - that was the only way she could describe it. Just as if a piece of thread attached to her heart had been gently pulled.
‘He’s alive!’
The toothbrush fell into the sink and she leaned her head against the mirror, feeling sick and shaky, her legs suddenly unable to hold her up.
‘Don‘t be so ridiculous!‘ she muttered out loud, pushing herself upright. ‘It’s just your imagination. You’re getting as bad as Willow with her predictions and feelings and weirdness.’
She marched herself under the shower and ran it cold, scrubbing at her skin until it hurt but some marks, she knew, were indelible, scoring her soul with flames. She stared at her hand under the running water. Odd to think it had once grasped Spike’s and burst into flame. Not a mark, not a scar, nothing she could cherish, just a memory.
Buffy knew one little bit of her had never given up hope completely that Spike would come back to her, but that was the part she’d locked away in a box inside a cupboard inside a castle and never, ever looked at.
But for all her determination during the day, at night her mind played tricks on her and she dreamed. Oh how she dreamed.... Of a time when they’d been happy, had laughed, touched, fought, shared, made love, and she’d felt complete, fulfilled and never ever realised it until it was too late.
She dreamed of a man who had aspired to be better, who’d gone searching for his soul, not been given it. Had dealt with all that life and death had thrown at him and still come out a champion at the end. Her champion.
She’d had a dream the night before, a wonderful, erotic, marvellous dream. She‘d been lying in bed and he’d been there, standing by her side. He’d touched her face, gently lifted a curl from her cheek with infinite love.
She’d rolled over, opening her eyes with a warm smile, holding out her arms to clasp him to her aching breasts - but the room had been empty. Just a dream.
‘And that’s all it ever will be,’ she thought.
But as she steadfastly got ready to enjoy herself, to go on with her life - because that was what he’d wanted her to do - she wondered if the tug on her heart would ever come again.
And she dreamed.....
to be continued
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