Home is Where the Heart Is, Part 11



Home is Where the Heart Is, Part 11
By *~Rachel*~

For disclaimers, summary, notes, etc. please see the first chapter.

Thanks for all the reviews on the last part! I'm glad that you all are enjoying the story, please continue to let me know what you think :0)

 
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"Hi Mom," Buffy softly murmured, kneeling down to place a bouquet of carnations and lilies, her mother's favorite flowers, at the top of the headstone. "Sorry I haven't been by in such a long time, but at least I managed to stop by before I left town again."

Buffy ran her fingers over the letters of her mother's name engraved in the marble before sinking onto the earth. It's been two years, and I'm still not over her. Does anyone ever get over the loss of a mother? "You'd be happy though; the gallery is doing really well. Everyone up in L.A. loves the place."

She sat in the grass, her head lowered to the ground, remembering all the good and bad times she had with her mother. "I'm getting married," she whispered. "Well, first I have to get a divorce, but...after that, I'm getting married to a really nice guy. You'd like him."

Liar. She'll always like Spike better, a voice inside her taunted.

Buffy was so lost in her thoughts and memories that she didn't hear anyone walking up to her until she felt someone grab her shoulder. She gasped out of surprise and quickly glanced behind her.

"Hello, love," Spike shakily greeted, as if almost nervous to speak up in front of her. He cast her a small smile and squeezed her shoulder before removing his hand.

Buffy frowned up at him, "What are you doing here, Spike?"

Spike held up his own collection of flowers. "C'mon, pet, who else do you think has been coming here to put flower's on Joyce's grave since..."

"You have?" she questioned in disbelief.

"Well, yeah..." Spike stated as if the reasoning were obvious. He placed his own gathering of flowers next to Buffy's before sitting down on the ground beside her. "Joyce was practically my own mum."

"She did have a strong liking for you; I admit it," Buffy noted.

"That she did, love," Spike agreed.

"Although, I can't imagine why."

Spike smirked at her before saying, "Must have been my impeccable charm and extreme good looks."

Buffy let out a soft, unladylike snort. "Yeah, right."

"Sorry, pet...just trying to lighten up the atmosphere a tad," Spike apologized, sending her an sorrowful look.

Buffy loudly sighed, raising her eyes to the sky for a brief second, looking everywhere but at the slab of stone that was in front of her. "God, I don't know how I got through her death at all," she remarked. "If you hadn't been there for me those first few weeks..." her voice died off, not wanting to bring up the past any more than was necessary.

"You would have gotten through it eventually," Spike assured her. "After all, Summers women are strong."

Buffy turned her gaze to the gray headstone, now having to force herself to hold back her tears. "I still miss her, Spike."

"Of course you do, that's to be expected. It's only been a couple of years," Spike said, trying to comfort her as much as possible. "My mum has been gone for much longer than that, and I still miss her. I told you that it'd take time."

"I remember," Buffy acknowledged. No, no, *no*! There he goes again, she warned herself. He's trying to drag up all these past memories and the things you don't want to remember. Her first reaction was to run away, but she forced herself to firmly remain in her spot on the ground next to him.

"And I promised to be there for you," Spike continued speaking. "And I was, when you let me, anyway."

Buffy glanced over at him out of the corner of her eye, "Spike, let's not go into this now, please," she pleaded. "I...I just wanted to come by and see her before I left town, and that's all." Buffy rose to her feet and hurried at a half-run, half-walk to her parking spot.

A second later, Spike caught up to her as she neared the entrance to the graveyard. "I swore that I'd be there for you," Spike repeated in her ear, his mouth clenching with anger. "And I'd still be, if you hadn't run off."

"Spike--"

"And I know that I usually wait for *you* to run off first, but this time, I think I'll scamper away before you have the chance." And before Buffy could react or think up some witty comeback, Spike defiantly strode away from her.

 
~~~

 
The funeral had been an absolute nightmare for Buffy. Although surrounded by the comfort of her friends, including Spike and his father, Buffy was too emotionally destroyed to even comprehend about what was going on, and the funeral passed by in a blur. As they lowered her coffin into the ground and began covering it up in dirt, Spike held onto her as Buffy finally released her tears, sobbing into his jacket and holding onto him for dear life.

But life had to go on, and Buffy was well aware of that fact. With Giles' help, Buffy started investigating the options for selling her mother’s house because no one was living there anymore, and Buffy couldn’t afford to pay the bills. The things she couldn’t bear to part with, she brought over to Spike's place, and everything else went into storage until Buffy could figure out what to do with everything.

Alone, Buffy dealt with the bills, the will, the property, and her mother’s personal belongings, grateful for at least having something to do that could keep her mind off what had happened.

Several weeks passed, and the only thing left to handle was the future of the popular art gallery, her mother's pride and joy. The gallery had been closed since the day of the funeral.

Spike, who had been by Buffy's side since Buffy heard the news about her mother’s death, went with Buffy to the gallery for emotional support. He had been worried about her for the past few days, seeing that she was emotionally shut down from everyone else, including him. He knew that she needed to snap out of it, but he didn't know when or how to make that happen.

"So...do you know what you're going to do yet, Buffy?" Spike asked as he watched Buffy unlock the front door and slowly step inside.

Buffy switched on the lights, hesitating to travel any further into the store. This was wrong...being in the gallery without her mother was simply *wrong*. "I don't know," she confessed. "To be honest, I've been trying to think about it as little as possible."

Spike came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, giving her a comforting squeeze. "That's understandable, love."

"I just don't know what to do here," she admitted. "I...I was going to start looking into a job after I finished up the rest of my classes, but..."

"Do you want to keep the gallery open?" he wanted to know.

Buffy shrugged. "It just seems wrong to close it. My mom worked *so* hard to get this place established, and it's so popular right now...I can't close it, Spike."

Spike pressed a kiss in her hair before unclasping his hands and treading up to the front desk. "All right, pet, we'll take things slow. Your mum should keep all of her files on this place around here somewhere..." He started searching through the folders and filing cabinets for anything that Joyce had recently left out.

Buffy glimpsed at the various pieces of artwork scattered around the gallery. God, my mom loved this place, she thought sadly.

Suddenly, Buffy picked up the first thing her fingers touched, a small green vase, and threw it against the wall nearest to her. She screamed when it crashed into the wall, tears of anger rolling down her cheeks.

What the bloody hell? Spike wondered to himself, spinning around in surprise at the instant he heard glass shattering.

"WHY her?!" Buffy roared, staring at Spike and demanding an answer. "Why did it have to be *her*, Spike?"

Spike ran up to her and gathered her into his arms. She's finally cracked, he realized. "I don't know, love."

"It's just not fair!" she screeched. "She never did anything wrong to anyone!"

"I know, Buffy," Spike assured her. "It's just that...sometimes that the way things go. It doesn't matter what the person was like or what they did."

"It's just *not* fair," she repeated, beating his chest with her fists a couple times.

Spike led her over to and helped her sit down in a chair. He knelt down beside her to look her in the eye. "I miss my mum, too, pet. I know that I never really talk about her to you or the gang, but...god, do I miss her."

Buffy blinked at him through tears, her eyes begging him to continue. Out of all the years she had known him, Spike had never said anything about his mother. "What was your mother like?"

"Not so surprisingly, a lot like yours. Maybe that's why I loved your mum so much," Spike realized. "And god, she was so in love with my father. They were so...romantic it was just sickening at times, y'know?"

Buffy chuckled.

"I know it's hard now, love, but we'll get through this. We will," he insisted. "And I promise that I'll always be here. If you ever need to talk, I'll be here for you...always have been, always will be."

Buffy smiled slowly. "I love you," she whispered, leaning and kissing him softly.

"And I love you," Spike repeated back to her.

"It was probably too soon for me to come here," Buffy acknowledged. "I just...I needed to get all of that out. I'd been holding all of it in for so long..."

"I understand," Spike affirmed.

"Can we do this another day? Maybe sometime next week? I promise next time I won't have a nervous breakdown," Buffy joked.

"Sure thing."

As the two were leaving the gallery, Spike asked her, "So, what are your plans for the gallery? Opened or closed?"

"I think I'm going to leave the gallery open and run it myself," Buffy explained. "In memory of my mom."


~~~

Spike kept the promise that he’d made after Buffy's breakdown at the gallery. Together, he helped Buffy work through the emotional pain regarding her mother's death. After several months together, Buffy was back to normal, and she and Spike were even closer.

Buffy managed to finish college and attain a diploma in graphic arts; however, since she spent so much time managing the gallery, Buffy was forced to place her plans for the future on hold. Despite the delay, Buffy wouldn't have given up the gallery for anything in the world; she just never realized what a huge job it would turn out to be.

Although she had hired Willow and Anya to help, the gallery had become a full time job right away. She was constantly busy hustling about, making phone calls, and running errands. Now I know how Mom felt, she thought to herself multiple times a day.

Buffy trudged to the front desk of the gallery -- her gallery, now -- and turned off the small lamp. Finally! she sighed to herself in relief, dragging her hands though her tangled hair as she checked her date book.

Tonight was Saturday evening, meaning she wouldn't have to step back into this building until Monday morning. And, she added to herself with joy. I get to spend tomorrow with my honey.

Quickly, she penciled a reminder in her agenda book to pick up the newest order in the Nina Browlen collection Monday afternoon. My work never ends in this place, she thought regrettably.

"Evenin', love," Spike greeted as he entered the gallery.

At once, a smile lit up Buffy's face as she welcomed her boyfriend, slamming the date book closed and rising out of her chair. "Hey, baby."

Spike strode straight for her and soundly kissed her. "Sorry, I wasn't interrupting anything, was I?"

Buffy groaned and shook her head "no." "I was just wrapping things up here for the night." She hugged him once more before stepping back. "What are you doing here? I was planning on coming on home in about another ten minutes."

"What can I say, I missed you too much to wait another ten minutes," Spike teased, pressing a loving kiss to her forehead. "C'mon, let's go," he commanded, tugging on her hand and leading her out the door.

"Fine, fine," Buffy admitted defeat, grabbing her keys and locking the door behind the two of them.

The couple turned and started strolling leisurely down the main sidewalk towards their home. Spike nervously fiddled around with something in his pocket as Buffy linked her arm through his and nuzzled her face against the side of his arm.

"Love, I -- uh, was wondering a bit..." Spike nervously began.

Buffy gazed up at him. "About what?"

"I was wondering if you've ever thought about our...future," he said hesitantly.

"Future?" Buffy repeated in confusion. "Spike, we're only twenty-three. I think that we have plenty of time left to discuss our future."

"I know, I know, but..." Spike cleared his throat before continuing, "I was wondering about marriage...wondering if -- if you would ever consider it."

Buffy stopped short, her eyes wide in disbelief. "What?! With you?"

"Well, I am an eligible bachelor, after all," Spike gently teased, smiling down at her.

"Spike...you just want to get married? What, right now?"

"Well, why not?" Spike demanded. "The restaurant is going well, the best I ever hoped it would be, and the gallery seems to be going well for you."

"Yeah, but--"

"And you're out of college, we're settled and financially secure and all that rot," he continued. "C'mon, Buffy. I’ve loved you since I met you. Marry me."

"Is that a request or a demand?" she wanted to know, the corners of her lips curling in a shy smile.

"C'mon, love, just give me an--"

"Yes," Buffy stated.

Spike paused, not sure if he heard her correctly. "Say that again, pet."

"Yes, Spike, I'll marry you." Who cares that we're so young? Buffy told herself, dismissing her doubts as she stared at the handsome man in front of her. I have a bad record with commitment, and I know it. What if this doesn't work out? Who cares! I love him too much.

Spike burst into laughter, a wide smile on his face. Extending his hands, Spike picked her up off the ground and started spinning her around, raining kisses on her face. A second later, after setting her back on her feet, Spike pulled something out of his coat pocket.

"Look, I know this isn't as good as a three-carot diamond engagement ring, but this is the best I can do," Spike explained, showing Buffy the ring that he held in his fingertips.

Buffy stared at the golden ring, awe on her expression. The ruby stone centered in the ring shone brightly in the reflection of the street lamp above the two of them. "No, Spike, it's beautiful," she breathed.

"It was my mum's," Spike told her. "She gave it to me, told me to hang onto it until I met the right woman. That's definitely you, love."

"I can't believe we're doing this," Buffy said in awe as she watched Spike slide the ring onto her finger.

"Me either. Never thought you'd say "yes," honestly," Spike replied in amazement. He tightly gathered her into his arms and kissed her cheek. "So, what's next?"

"Let's run away and get married now," Buffy suggested excitedly. "I want to be Mrs. Buffy Summers Giles tonight." She pressed her body against his and roughly kissed him. "I want to come back home and make love to my *husband* tonight."

"Well then, I guess we'd better get a move on," Spike agreed impulsively. "It's a long drive to Las Vegas." He led her over to his DeSoto and opened the passenger door for her.

As Buffy hurridly glanced in the backseat, she saw a long, white dress stretched out on the seat. "Spike! You expected me to say "yes" all along, didn't you!" She playfully punched him in the arm before climbing into the car.

"I knew you wouldn't be able to resist my charm." Spike said once he was in the driver’s seat beside her.

Buffy leaned over and kissed him once more. "Guess you were right." She settled back into the seat as Spike started up the car. "Vegas, here we come!"

 
 
~~~

 
"Can I get you anything?"

"Yes, I'd like a mocha cappuccino, please," Buffy requested as she sat at a table inside the Expresso Pump.

"Sure thing," the waitress replied, jotting a note on her pad as she walked away from the table.

Here's hoping that this place has improved since I was last here, Buffy thought as she pulled out her agenda calendar.

"So, pet, is this extra seat saved for anyone?" a voice drawled out from in front of her.

Buffy raised her head and rolled her eyes when she saw who was standing before her. "Ohmigod," she muttered quickly. "You *must* be stalking me; I'm sure of it now."

"It's a small town, Buffy," Spike argued. "People run into each other more often in small towns than some places like...oh, let's say, Los Angeles."

Buffy scowled at him, hoping that he'd go away. When she heard the scraping of chair legs against the concrete floor of the cafe, she glanced back up at him in surprise. "What are you doing?"

"Sitting here," Spike answered her, completely pulling out the chair and planting himself in it. "Since obviously no one else is going to."

The blonde waitress approached Buffy's table with a Styrofoam cup in her hands. "Here you go, miss," she said as she placed the drink in front of Buffy. She turned to Spike, asking, "Would you like anything, sir?"

Buffy's eyes doubled in size, and she quickly shook her head for Spike. "No, no, he doesn't want anything," she insisted. "He was just leaving."

Spike smirked at Buffy before turning and smiling at the waitress. "I think I'll stick around, actually. I'll take a coffee with three creams, love."

"I'll be right back," the waitress noted as she turned around and headed back into the kitchen.

"Aren't you suppose to be at the restaurant right now?" Buffy asked, trying to think of some way to get rid of him.

"No, Xander and some of the other staff members are looking after everything while I'm gone," Spike clarified. "It's pretty slow today for some reason."

"Oh," Buffy murmured. "But, other than today, it's doing well?"

"Better than I could have ever imagined," he admitted. "The Internet cafe is turning into a big success. We're planning on ordering some new computers next week, and...and you don't really want to be hearing about my business, do you, pet?" Spike questioned when he saw a distant, uninterested expression cross Buffy's features. Buffy scowled and placed her concentration into staring back down at her date book, trying to act extremely interested in her schedule for next week.

"Is that a planner for your schedule at the gallery?" Spike questioned her a second later.

"So, what? Now we're going to have a conversation?" Buffy demanded to know before taking a small sip of her coffee. Nope, this place has definitely not improved since the last time I was here.

Before Spike had a chance to reply, the waitress again neared the table, this time carrying Spike's coffee. "Here you are, sir."

"Thanks, pet," he politely answered her, returning his gaze to Buffy and waiting for an answer.

Buffy sighed and rolled her head to look away from him. "Yes, it is for the gallery." She cast him an "are you happy, now?" look before going back to studying her agenda.

"How is the gallery?"

"It's good...busy," Buffy explained. "It's still pretty popular, y'know?" What are we doing? Buffy questioned herself as she stared at the man sitting across from her. We're drinking coffee together, having a somewhat civilized conversation so far...dammit, I fell into his trap after all.

Spike scoffed at her with nothing but anger in his eyes. "Of course I know that place is hoppin'," he stated. "It's that damned gallery's fault that you left me in the first place."

"Please don't start that up again with me, Spike," Buffy pleaded. I can't even drink my somewhat over-brewed coffee in peace without worrying if he's going to come up and annoy me to death.

Spike smirked, "Maybe if you hadn't run off at the first sign of trouble, like you always do, we could have worked through it all!"

"I didn't..." Buffy began, her voice dying off. "Maybe if you weren't so stubborn and hadn't *yelled* at me about it so much that night, I *would* have to stayed to work through it with you."

"Now what the hell is that suppose to mean?" Spike wanted to know. Does that mean she was going to stay with me?

"You! You're so stubborn," Buffy answered.

"Oh, and you're not?" Spike raised his scarred eyebrow in disbelief. Isn't this about when she usually runs off now? he wondered. Oh, here we go now, he corrected himself when he saw her reach for her purse.

"I'm *so* out of here," she muttered, snapping shut her book. "I can't even believe that I thought we could carry on a conversation together anymore without it ending in an argument."

Spike reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her from going any further. "Wait."

Buffy paused, feeling incredibly guilty. "I...I can't believe I'm saying this, but after...I missed talking to you...having someone to confide in." Why am I telling him this? "But I should go," she added. Your week is almost up, Spike, she wanted to tell him. And so far, you haven't convinced me to do anything but run back home.

"Oh my god!" a girl shouted, sitting at the bar and staring up at the television with a dreamy look on her face. "Hel--lo salty goodness! It's Angel O'Connor! Hey, can you turn that up, please?"

Buffy stared at the television screen, surprise on her features. He didn't tell me that he had any premieres he was attending this week. She felt Spike slowly release her arm, and she took a step closer towards the television, watching the current "Inside Story."

Angel O'Connor was walking down a red carpet, passing a poster that read "Temptations of the Heart," Mena Suvari and Orlando Bloom's new movie. Angel almost entered the theater when a reporter rushed up to him, pushing a microphone with the ET label into his face.

"Good evening, Mr. O'Connor," she greeted.

"Hello, Ms. Gibbons," Angel replied, stopping to smile for the fans and flashing cameras gathering at the side of the carpet.

"Tell me, Mr. O'Connor, where's the lovely young lady that we usually see attached to your right arm?" she asked, sticking the microphone even closer to his mouth to hear the response.

"She's visiting friends," Angel explained.

Lisa Gibbons smiled, "Well, we're all just so used to seeing your girlfriend appearing at the premieres with you that--"

"Well, actually, she's my fiancée now."

"What?!" The girl watching TV sighed in despair. "He's getting married?"

Buffy's mouth fell open. How dare he! Before Buffy left, the two had agreed to keep their engagement a secret from the press until she got back at the earliest. *Now* everyone was going to know!

"Well," Spike began as ET went to a commercial break. Great, just another bloody reminder that this woman isn't really mine anymore. "That certainly ruined the mood, didn't it?"

"Spike," she started a second before she was cut off.

"Look, why don't I get out of your bloody way," he suggested, standing up and pushing the chair back under the table. "You can stay here and finish your coffee. I just...I don't bloody care what you do anymore." Defeated, Spike stood up and stormed out of the Expresso Pump.

Buffy sat back down in her chair. Seeing Angel blurt out the news of their engagement bothered her, but what disturbed her more was the fact she had just unintentionally hurt Spike's feelings.

 
~~~

 
TBC...

 
 





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