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I can do this, Buffy told herself looking at the house from across the street, I can walk up to the door and let someone help me. Why was it that asking for help was harder than doing things on your own, she wondered taking the first step forward. Like it or not she had seen her future tonight, not in the reflective waters but in a man that had become a monster. She took another step forward and then another and before she could talk herself out of it, she ran the rest of the way to the door.

Being the closest one to the door, while Faith tried to piece out what had happened in her own phone call with Angel, Spike opened it when he had heard the first soft, nearly inaudible knock. Buffy stood there, her hair tangled and clinging to her wet skin and clothes while a narrow rivulet of blood worked it’s way down her arm. Without thinking he pulled her into his arms just needing to reassure himself that she was there and not some byproduct of his worry.

He expected her to struggle the moment he felt her chilled skin against his and he started to pull away figuring that she had been through enough tonight without another confrontation but to his surprise he felt her arms reach around him and pull him close. At first she seemed unsure and uncertain but after the first few moments he felt her hands grab onto to his jacket tightly. “What happened luv?”

“I realized I needed a friend.” She said softly knowing that he wasn‘t just talking about her appearance. She laid her cheek against his shoulder and just let herself be held.

“Buffy, Angel’s on the phone…he wants to talk to you.” Faith told her uncertainly.

It had been so long since she had been touched in a way that wasn‘t sexual and she wasn’t willing to pull away just yet. “I have nothing to say to him.”

“Buffy, he wants…” Faith said, feeling caught between two unmovable forces of nature. Angel was as solid and as unyielding as a rock and Buffy was as unpredictable and as forceful as the wind.

“I don’t care what he wants.” Buffy said before burying her face in Spike’s chest. She was experiencing her first foray into gentleness here and she wasn’t about to spoil that by having another fight with Angel. It wasn’t his fault that she had accepted Travers offer but he had still let her down and she didn’t care to be reminded of that just as she was trying to place her trust in someone else.

“Buffy maybe if you talk to him you…”

“Bloody hell, leave her alone.” Spike snarled at her, pulling Buffy closer as she began to shiver. “The girl said she didn’t want to talk to the poufter, so let it go.”

Buffy heard Faith telling Angel to try again later and she looked up at Spike, her eyes shimmering with gratitude. “Thanks.”

“What are friends for pet?” He said giving her a wink. “But I think I should get an birthday card at the very least.”

“You’re what, a hundred and some change? I don’t think they make cards for people coming up on their second bicentennial.” When he laughed, she pulled away just enough to see his face clearly. “Don’t even so much as think the word kitten.”

“It never crossed my mind luv,” he lied smoothly, dropping a light kiss on the top of her head. “But I’d settle for knowing what’s going on in yours right now.”

She had taken a step forward but she wasn’t about to dive in just yet so regretfully she eased away and turned to look at the others. “Did you all know that you have your very own Frankenstein’s monster running loose in the woods?”

“You ran into Professor Walsh’s creation?” Giles asked.

“Yeah Adam and I have officially met. We sat down, had a little chat and then he offered me an ‘upgrade’ like he was the demon equivalent of a techie at Radio Shack.”

“Is that how you got this?” Spike asked running his hand over the shallow cut in her upper arm.

“He nicked me when I jumped into a pond to avoid him. I figured that with all that heavy metal he wasn’t really designed to play in the water. My pants are trashed and I‘m pretty sure the top got a rip or two but I‘m standing here, so I guess it was worth it.” She told them with a shrug. “So why don’t you tell me what’s going on with him?”

While Giles went to fetch her some dried clothes and a blanket, Riley filled her in on everything they knew about Adam. “I don’t think Professor Walsh knew that she was creating a monster or atleast I’d like to believe that.”

“She didn’t, she bent the rules of nature a bit sure, but Adam chose to be a monster on his own.” She told them all about the conversation they had shared but kept her own feeling about the matter to herself. “I think it’s safe to assume that Doyle’s version about you all fighting a demon army, was Adam’s way of changing the rules. I don’t know what he was planning but from the way Doyle talked, it’s going to be bad.”

“I know what he’s planning.” When every pair of eyes shifted in his direction, he refused to look away. Buffy had taken a pretty big step tonight and if he wanted to be the kind of man she deserved, he had to come clean. “He offered to take out my chip, so we made a deal. He gave me that disk Red is trying to crack because he wants Faith to even up the body count when he lets all the demons in the Initiative loose. He had them get captured telling them that he wanted them to destroy the facility but in truth he plans on locking everyone in and rounding up the bits when its all over.”

When Faith stepped forward and lunged at him with a right cross, Buffy stood up and caught her arm, mid swing. “Come on Faith are you really surprised that he wanted to get the chip removed? He didn’t have to tell us, so ease off.”

“For all we know, this is just another part of the master plan.” Faith said harshly pulling her arm away. “Or he’s just telling us because with you added to our side, he knows that we have a better chance to make it out and he doesn’t want to get staked.”

“Either way he’s back on our side now and that gives us an advantage. Are you in this to win or are you more concerned about blowing it by getting even?” Buffy asked her calmly.

“How can you defend him?” Xander asked jumping into the conversation. “He just admitted that he betrayed us, giving us more than enough reason to not trust him again and here you go wanting to make him a part of our plan!”

“I get that you’re pissed and if I was in your shoes I would be too. But since I wasn’t around for all that, I’m not. He hasn’t betrayed me, so he gets the benefit of the doubt.”

“He will if you give him time. You’ve only known him for what an entire day, he just hasn’t had the chance yet.” Xander shot back.

“Actually he stayed the night at my place last night and he could have taken me out when I was asleep but he didn’t. If he was all worried about me shifting the tide in your favor he would have but since he didn’t that makes me want to trust him. In case you missed it, I trying to turn over a new leaf here but if he double crosses me I’ll be the first to stake him. Until then I decided he’s my new best friend.”

“So is that what it takes to earn your friendship Buffy, we have to buy it?” Xander asked coldly. “He is a demon and if you keep siding with him then sooner or later we’re going to have to start wondering if we can trust you.”

“He didn’t give me a damn dime and for someone dating an ex-demon, you sure as hell are quick to cast stones.” Buffy said feeling her own temper rise up. Rome wasn’t built in a day and it looked like the new and more feeling Buffy would take some time too, she decided.

“I like Anya but I’m still betting that their are more than a few bodies in her past. I am giving her the benefit of the doubt so how is it any different with what I am doing with Spike. Spike has a chip and that almost like her losing her powers but since you’re the one sleeping with her she earns the chance to prove herself. While Spike on the other hand is just someone you push around. I saw the way you all treat him, I heard the rude comments last night and if you treated me like that I wouldn‘t be to loyal either.” Buffy sat back down on the sofa besides Spike and waited for the bit of information to sink in, not just for Xander but for everyone. “I can’t force you to trust him or even give him a chance but I am asking you to. Not just for me but because a lot of people could die if we don‘t. Who knows, he might just surprise you, if you give the chance to prove himself.”





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