Spike and Buffy had been gone for hours, and Angel was sick of waiting. He stalked towards the door, determined to find them and put an end to all of this.
"And just where do you think you're going?"
Angel turned sharply, staring at the woman now standing in his room. "Cordelia?"
"The one and only. And again I ask, where are you going?"
"Spike and Buffy have been gone all day. I have to find them."
"Um, in case you haven't noticed, it's a little bright out there. Unless your method of finding them involves being a flaming pillar of dust, I suggest you stay in."
"I can go through the sewers."
"So you're what, going to wander around the L.A. sewer system trying to catch a glimpse of them somewhere?" When Angel frowned but said nothing, Cordelia continued. "Buffy doesn't need you to be her protector, especially not now."
"But Spike is probably out there putting the moves on her again. He isn't right for her!"
"Not your decision to make."
"He mystically transformed from vampire to human in the middle of a battle with Wolfram and Hart. That can't be a good thing."
"Wasn't it at the end of the battle—an apocalyptic battle?"
"It wasn't the Shanshu, Cordy."
"What makes you so sure of that?"
"Because it's Spike!"
Cordelia sighed, crossing her arms in front of her. "Vampire with a soul, fought in the apocalypse, stop me when I get to something that sounds Shanshu-related here."
"But I'm the one who worked for it! I spent years earning the right to that prophecy.—and years before that suffering because of what I'd done as Angelus. Spike's had a soul for what, five minutes, and he's Shanshu worthy? Not possible."
"Have you completely forgotten you signed it away?" Cordelia asked, arching an eyebrow. "Which, might I add, was just a stupid thing to do."
"It was my destiny! That shouldn't have mattered! You can't change a prophecy!"
"It didn't change, Angel. The prophecy was fulfilled the way it was always meant to be fulfilled."
Angel stared at her. "What?"
Cordelia took his hand. "We all have our destinies, Angel. This was Spike's. Yours lays elsewhere."
"I can't accept that! I'm the vampire with a soul!"
"And now you're back to being the only one. The prophecy was fulfilled, and the universe has balance again."
"It should've been me."
"Maybe. Maybe not. But that isn't the issue anymore—or the reason I'm here. The Powers made their decision, and it's in the past now. Spike is human, and that can't be changed. It's the future I'm worried about. You've lost the mission, Angel. You lost it the moment you signed that devil's deal with Wolfram and Hart."
"I did that to save Connor. You of all people should understand that."
Cordelia dropped his hand. "But is that even what you did—and is that the only reason why you did it? You were lost. Everything you'd believed in had been turned on its head. Wolfram and Hart swooped down at just the right time, got you when you were weak. They offered you more than just a new life for Connor. Don't lie to me and say that's all it was. I know better than that, and so do you."
"I wanted to bring down Wolfram and Hart—and I did."
"Do you really believe that?"
"I stopped the Circle of the Black Thorn."
"Evil doesn't just disappear, Angel. It goes somewhere else, finds someone new. The Senior Partners are still there. They always will be. There has to be a balance."
"Evil has to be stoppable, Cordy. If it's not, then why do I even fight?"
"You fight because it's the right thing to do."
"That's not enough!"
Cordelia placed her hand gently against his cheek. "You still have a long way to go. You focus so much on redeeming yourself, on atoning for the sins of Angelus. But the past is in the past. You can't change what you did, and you can't make any of it better. You have to focus on what's happening now and what will happen in the future. Trying to change yesterday is pointless, Angel. But working towards tomorrow—that you can do. You don't do good to make up for the bad—you do it because it's right."
"Cordelia, I…"
Cordelia moved her hand down, pressing her fingers against his lips. "No. I can't stay much longer, and I need you to listen to me. You're getting obsessed again, and we both know where your obsessions lead. You let yourself get so wrapped up in things that you don't see the world around you anymore. You can't do that again. Just accept what is. She's going to be happy, Angel. Just let that be enough for you."
"But I worked so hard…"
"And you still have work to do. I'm sorry, but that's the way things are." Cordelia stepped back from him. "I have to go now. Please, remember what I said."
"Why do you have to leave? Why weren't you here this morning?" Angel reached out for her, but stopped before he actually managed to touch her. "If you're here now, why can't you stay?"
"I just can't yet. I'm sorry. I'd rather be here with you than anywhere else, but now isn't the time. It was hard enough for me to get here this morning, but I knew you needed me. So don't make this all a waste of my time. Be the champion I know you are." When she finished speaking, Cordelia faded from view.
Angel touched the spot where she'd been but felt nothing. He wondered if maybe he'd lost his mind, if he'd been pushed to the point of hallucination. Cordelia was just as gone as she'd been that morning, not even a trace of her scent remaining.
He didn't leave the hotel room.
*** *** ***
Spike wasn't sure what had possessed him to do it. He'd seen the "Test Your Strength" game, and he'd been too curious not to. He had to see what he was capable of, now that he was human. Test the waters a little.
And he'd gotten his answer—in the form of a smashed strength-tester. The initial shock of the worker at what Spike had managed to accomplish had allowed him and Buffy to sneak away before questions—or demands that Spike pay for the damages—began.
But now he and Buffy were sitting in an uncomfortable silence, too many questions to ask and not enough answers. Buffy spoke first, and her comment sounded lame even to her own ears.
"You're stronger than human."
"Well, yeah," Spike replied, his hands fidgeting on top of the picnic table that separated them.
"Did you know that was going to happen?"
"Think I would've done it if I'd known?"
Buffy frowned. He had a point with that. "But…you're human now. You're in the sunlight, and your heart is beating, and…and your skin is warm. You're human. Humans can't do what you just did."
Spike looked down at the table. Andy loved Maria. Keith had been there in '02. "My senses are still heightened," he admitted softly.
"And you're just now telling me this?"
Spike's head shot up. "I wasn't sure until now, all right? They've been heightened for 125 years, Buffy. It took me a bit to realize that that shouldn't be normal anymore. And I still wasn't sure if they were or if, well, if it was just you."
"Me?"
"Your scent, it's always been so strong to me. And don't make that face about it either. It's…it's a good smell. I thought maybe you were just having the same effect on me you always did, but then other things were stronger than I thought they should be, too, and that strength thing—I needed to test it. I needed to know."
"Are you still a vampire?" Buffy asked. "Did you get a mystical equivalent of the Gem of Amara?"
"I don't think so. Like you said, my heart's beating. I tried to hold my breath a few minutes ago, and it made my chest burn. My body has been behaving like a human's this whole time—not a vampire's. I don't know what's going on anymore than you do."
"I guess we should get back," Buffy said with a sigh. "We need to look into this."
Spike's eyes shifted back down to the table, his finger tracing the carved letters. "I know. I just don't want to."
"Me either. I've…I've been having a good time out with you. But we need to."
He looked at her again. "I know. Do you think maybe we could not go to the Hyperion? All the Slayers might still be running around, and it's bound to be a mess with all the…"
"With all the Angel being there?" Buffy asked with a small smile.
"Yeah."
"Is there some place else we could go?"
"I have an apartment."
"Really?"
"Well, yeah. Did you honestly think I could live in the same building as Peaches?"
"No, I just…well, I never pictured you in anything but a crypt. Or an old abandoned factory…"
"Well, I think the crypt was a little nicer than this place, but it serves its purpose."
"Does it have a phone? 'Cause I'm going to need to call Giles."
"Yes."
Buffy stood up. "We'll go there then. I think I'd rather keep a low profile about this right now anyway, at least until we know more about what's going on."
"Me, too."
Spike stood beside Buffy, his hands in his pockets. "Let's go back to my place then."
*** *** ***
"Sorry it's so, well, basement-like," Spike said as he led Buffy into his apartment. He was happy to see everything as he'd left it, since after the way things had been going, he'd half expected it to have disappeared. "No windows, but that used to be a plus as far as I was concerned."
"It's cheerier than my basement was."
"And the bed is bigger, too. Although not by much," Spike replied, gesturing towards his bedroom.
"You have me in your apartment for under a minute, and you're already showing me your bed."
Spike's eyes widened. "Buffy, I didn't mean, I…I'm…"
Buffy laughed. "I'm teasing you, Spike. I knew what you meant. I remember how tiny that cot was, too. Not that I minded at the time…"
"So, um, you wanted to call Giles?" Spike asked, not wanting to go down that particular branch of Memory Lane. Things were complicated enough as it was.
"Yeah. Where's the phone?"
"In the bedroom—by the infamous bed."
"Right. I'll be right back."
As Buffy went off to call Giles, Spike went to the fridge, glad to find his beers where also where he'd left them. He popped the top off one and started to drink it quickly, when he realized he had no idea the effect it would have on him. Did his semi-vampiric abilities extend to alcohol consumption, or would he get drunk at a human rate? He figured he'd have to test it, but now wasn't the time. Instead he sat at the table, slowly nursing the drink as he waited for Buffy to come back.
"Giles is getting on the first plane to L.A.," Buffy announced when she walked out of the bedroom.
"How'd he take the news?" Spike asked, still seated.
Buffy leaned against the wall, her arms crossed in front of her. "He reached for his glasses so fast he dropped the phone. And that was before I told him you had retained some of your vampiric traits."
"So not well then?"
"Not well exactly, but not bad either. He just took the news…well, like Giles."
"Lots of 'oh dears?'"
"Interspersed between the 'good Lords.'"
"Good to see some things stay the same."
"He won't be here until tomorrow sometime," Buffy said.
"And in the meantime?" Spike asked.
"As much as I really, really don't want to, I need to go to Angel's hotel. It's Slayer Central right now, and I should be checking on my girls. A lot of them were injured, and I've been neglecting them."
Spike glanced down at the top of his beer can. "I'm sorry. That's my fault."
"No, it's mine. I put you first—and I don't regret that. They had people watching over them. But I do need to go over there, get a damage report. I'll come back here as soon as I can."
"You don't have to…"
"I know. I want to."
"No word to Peaches about this, right?" Spike asked, glancing up again.
"My lips are sealed. He'd just, well, make things more complicated."
"That's an understatement to beat all understatements, pet."
Buffy smirked. "Wait for me here, okay? I'll be back."
"Nowhere else to go," Spike replied.
Unable to stop herself, Buffy walked over, placing a soft kiss on his cheek. "I'll see you soon, Spike."
As she turned and walked to the door, Spike's hand went up to touch the place her lips had just left. "See you soon," he repeated.
Buffy glanced back and gave him a smile before leaving.
*** *** ***
I know you've got something to say. Review please. :-)
Also, this fic is nominated in the Dark Moon Awards. Check it out here: http://www.geocities.com/valepuiguy/thedarkmoonawards
[Reviews - 322]
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | 
Chapter or Story
Has been viewed 7120 times
- Text Size +
-
Table of Contents [Report This]
Chapter or Story |
Chapter or Story | Chapter or Story - Text Size +