Chapter 2


Tentatively, Giles opened the door to Spike’s crypt. He was sitting on the sofa, reading, did a double take when he saw who it was.

“S-S-S-Spike?”

“What do you want?” Spike asked, more in surprise than anything.

“Erm…I need to s-s-speak to -” Spike rolled his eyes, closed his book, and said,

“You need, to shut the bleeding door mate, I’ll have leaves and rats and all sorts in else”

“Oh, erm r-r-right, er s-s-sorry” Giles turned, closed the door.

“Well, I’m waiting?”

“W-W-Well, um it’s l-l-like th-this…”

“For the gods sake, stop mumbling in the dark, come in say your piece, the sooner you tell me the sooner you can piss…” Spike looked cockily at the nervous watcher. ‘Now here’s a turn up’ Spike thought

“Um, yes, right, well, the um, the Ball for St. Vigius”

“What about it?” Spike frowned

“I take it, you’re going…?”

“You take it wrong, no, I’m not, goodnight” Spike said, returning to his book.

“May, erm, m-m-may one ask w-w-why not?”

“Oh, you’re still here. (He stood up, leaving his open book on he couch.) Well, if it’s ANY of your business………which it isn’t, so……… on your way” Spike suddenly said, taking a couple of steps towards Giles.

“But I only…”

“Don’t care, sod off”

“If an invites the problem…” Giles began. Spike frowned. The Ball for St Vigius, was renowned for it’s sumptuous luxury, no expense was spared, on good food, rarest wines and spirits, certain ‘illegal’ substances of the purest kind…freshest blood, every delight that a vampire could ever want.

His face screwed up in disgust, Spike blustered,

“Why would you think that I, William the Bloody, would go to a great big prancing poofy party like that, that’s more Angel’s style, huge big ponce he is” Spike added for good measure.

He strutted about a bit.

“Ah, y-y-yes, w-w-well, um, y-y-you s-s-s-see, they know about h-h-his s-s-soul, whereas you, on the, the, other h-h-hand, a-a-a-are, um…”

“THE biggest bad Motherfu………hold on, YOU could get me an invite?”

Spike’s demeanour suddenly changed again. Without a word, Giles held up a black deckle edged card with gold lettering.

Spike’s eyebrows rose, he reached for the card, but Giles was too quick, and put it back inside his filofax.

“A-a!”

“Huh, forgery!” Spike said, half turning away from the watcher, and then he added,

“Bye, just let the door hit you on the arse on the way out”

“It’s not a forgery, it’s real alright” Giles said. Spikes eye’s narrowed, and he turned to face the watcher again, advancing a few steps towards him.

“So why, would you, be coming to me, with a ticket to vampire paradise, I wonder, hmm?”

“Th-thought you, you, you’d l-l-like to go”

“What have I got to do?” Spike sighed, asked suspiciously turning fully towards the watcher.

“Um, take Buffy” Spike nodded, then he realised what Giles had just said.

“WHAT!!! – With the risk of sounding like John MacEnroe, You CANNOT be serious” Spike was wide eyed with incredulity.

“I th-thought you’d say that” Giles bit his bottom lip, removing his glasses.

“What do you expect? Gods, it would be like taking a naked flame into a, a, a bloody firework factory! ” He threw his hands up in the air, rather pleased with his analogy.

“Hmm, yes, well, I-I-I-if she promised not to s-s-s-s-stake anyone?” he put his glasses back on. Spike stopped pacing and faced the watcher.

“Like I’d believe you!” Spike said, sarcastically, nodding slowly.

“She wouldn’t…” Giles said, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“So, let me get this straight, you want me, to take the slayer to a vampire party, and she’s going to, what, get a spontaneous attack of amnesia, and totally forget she’s the slayer, and not make all and sundry get intimately acquainted with Mr Pointy, have I got that?”

“Hmm”

“And I had this frontal lobotomy, when?” Spike quirked an eyebrow, and was just about to bundle the watcher out of his crypt, when Giles added,

“She’ll be under your thrall”

“Under my thrall…WHAT? - Are you for real? - Come on, what have you done with the real Giles, eh? – Where is he?”

“Spike, it’s me, I know what I’m saying…” Spike decided to humour the watcher; he folded his arms and leant against the crypt wall. After a minute or two Spike said,

“So. You do know that to be under my thrall for any decent length of time, I’d have to bite her”

“Yes…” Giles said, a little flatly, looking down at his shoes, then up into the vampire’s face. The idea suddenly began to REALLY appeal to Spike………

“So, again, why, yadda, yadda, yadda?”

“Well, when I say she won’t stake anyone…”
Spike rolled his eyes, ‘here we go…’ he thought.

“It’ll be just the one”

“Just the one, whom?” Spike enunciated every word, like he was talking to a six year old.

“Dracula” Giles said seriously. A huge grin spread over Spike’s face, he looked at Giles wide eyed, still grinning, then he gave a snort of derision.

“Ha! Now I KNOW you’re seriously off your trolley, anyway, how do you know he’s going? – I mean, he’s not usually one for crowds…unless it’s-!” Spike was trying to think.

“It is. Special one that is; twenty five years since he went to the last one” Giles said. Spike dismissed Giles with a,

“Pfft, you MUST be off your trolley!”

“No.” Giles said, nervously, but with as much conviction as he could muster.

“YES. Do you KNOW how many minions he has around him – not to mention his ‘brides’, if she can get anywhere near him at all, which I very much doubt…he’ll only re-materialise in an instant, anyway.”

“Ah, that’s it, with this special…um, (thinking quickly, Giles thought it best not to give too much away, this sort of knowledge meant power…so he tried a different tack) ok, you’re too scared, I understand…” he turned to leave.

Spike dashed to the door, stood in front of it to prevent Giles from leaving.

“What, never! I’m not scared, of anything, or anybody, not even feisty blonde slayers…it’s just that if I take the slayer there, and she off’s old Drac…I’m quite attached to me old wrinklies see” Spike said, truthfully, grabbing his crotch, knowing full well that he’d be parted from them in an instant if he was found out.

“Don’t worry, once the deed is done, we’d get you out, safely” Spike quirked an eyebrow, looked disbelievingly at Giles.

“And I believe you, because?”

“Well, to put it bluntly, you’re useful.” Giles said, truthfully. Spike said,

“One more question, does the slay- erm, I mean, does Buffy know about this, yet?”

“Ahh” Giles said, and gave Spike a rueful look, biting his bottom lip. Spike just rolled his eyes, let out a big sigh. He began to think…what were the odds of this…’escapade’ for want of a better word, succeeding - - with them both coming out of it alive – well ok, Buffy still alive, and he still intact, and in existence? About 5%………Ok, he’d do it! ‘Coz that’s the kind of vampire I am…’Spike said out loud.

Buffy came into the shop. Giles looked up from the book he was reading. The first thing that Buffy saw, was Spike’s duster hanging up. She frowned as she draped her scarf over her coat on the hook.

Coming around the bookcase, she saw Spike sitting with his feet up on the table, his chair teetering on the back two legs, reading a newspaper. She stood, arms folded across her chest, leaning on one hip.

“What’s he doing here?” With a nod of her head towards him, she glared at Spike, but was talking to Giles.

“And bollocks to you too, madam!” Spike said, without looking up from the newspaper.

“Ah, Buffy, g-glad you’re h-here, um, yes, right, erm…” Giles had taken his glasses off, put them back on, and taken them off again in that one stuttering sentence of his. Buffy arched her brow.

“Er, Spike, if you d-d-don’t m-mind” Giles looked at him.

“Your place, you go in the training room if you want to tell her ladyship here, I’m reading.” With that, Spike shook the newspaper once, and went back to reading.

“Buffy, if you wouldn’t mind…” Giles stood, and held out his arm towards the training room door, Buffy frowned, narrowed her eyes at Spike, and followed Giles into the training room.

Spike who wasn’t really reading, began to listen to Giles’ low murmur, and although he couldn’t hear exactly what Giles was saying, he reckoned, what, thirty…no forty seconds with all the stuttering the Watcher was surely going to do while he explained………’thirty five, thirty six, thirty seven, thirty eig–

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FREAKING MIND!?” Spike heard from the training room. Grinning broadly as the door flew open and one VERY pissed off slayer came stomping into the shop, still shouting.

“THERE’S NO WAY ON THIS EARTH, I’M DOING THAT, WITH HIM!” Still scowling, she turned her wrath on Spike.

“And I don’t know what you’re grinning at, I’m sure!”

“Well, put it this way sweetheart, I’m just about as enthused as you over this idea”.

“Shyeah, right! THAT’S why you’re sitting there now grinning like a lunatic, like it hasn’t been your every dream to bite me and have me in your thrall since the moment you clapped eyes on me!” Buffy sneered.

Deciding to needle her just a little bit more, Spike used one of her corrupt speech patterns, and said,

“Huh, ego much, blondie?” Buffy blinked and then narrowed her eyes at him.

Spike took his feet off the table, and folded the paper, throwing it on the table, and stood up.

“What day is the party?” Spike asked Giles.

“Tomorrow week”

“Right, we’ll start after patrol tonight, she, needs lessons on how to act around vampires” Spike said, talking about Buffy as if she wasn’t there.

“I KNOW how to act around vampires, thankyou very much, I do this, (she mimed a staking) and then they fit into an ashtray, end of story!”

Giving her a false grin, Spike narrowed his eyes, shook his head at her.

“Ok, um, back here at say… m-m-m-midnight?” Giles said, looking from Spike to Buffy.

Spike nodded. Buffy looked cross.

“What part of ‘there no way on this earth I’m doing that with him’ don’t you understand?” Buffy said through gritted teeth at Giles.

“Buffy, I…” Giles began; he removed his glasses. Spike strolled to the shop door, gliding, panther like, stalking his prey. Without turning till he stood in the open doorway, he said,

“You’ll do it Buffy, coz you’re just big headed enough to want to be THE one to go down in history as the slayer that off’d Dracula” Spike left.

Buffy stared at the door long after he’d gone. Giles put the snick up on the door, turned the key.
“What does he mean, ‘act around vampires?’”

“Ah, well, s-s-s-submissive, er, you’ll have to be s-s-s-subservient…and not sh-show any dominance at all, Buffy don’t look at me like that, It makes me think you want to hurt me” Buffy said nothing at first, scowled, and then smiled.

“Training. Come on, pad up Giles” Giles swallowed, nodded and almost reluctantly followed her back into the training room, thinking, huh, so much for my temporary bonding spell…





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