Chapter 18 - Second Chances


“How did it go?” Angel asked, sitting in the chair across from Spike.

“The usual- anger, denial, drama…and Buffy wasn’t much better,” he added with a smirk, tossing the other man a beer bottle before leaning back in his chair and lighting a cigarette.

“Very funny,” Angel muttered. “Are you two okay?”

“I don’t know,” Spike said with a slight shrug. “I think she might give me a second chance…not that I deserve one.”

“Why do you think you don’t deserve one?”

Looking at his friend as if he had lost his mind, Spike clenched his jaw as he glanced at the hallway that led to his bedroom. The same room that he couldn’t walk into without being assaulted by the horrible images of Buffy’s terrified face. “I tried to rape her, Angel,” he said quietly. “I don’t know how she could forgive me for that.”

“It’s up to her,” his friend replied softly. “If she thinks you should be forgiven, then why question it?”

“Because I remember every detail. It all comes back to me with so much clarity that it chokes me. I don’t want to hurt her again,” he said, shaking his head and staring up at the ceiling.

“Do you think you would?”

“No,” Spike replied shaking his head. “At least, I’d like to think I wouldn’t, but is it worth the risk?”

“For you or for her?”

Spike stayed quiet, his jaw tightening as he turned once more to look at the hallway. “For her,” he muttered, feeling a sense of finality run through him.

* * * * *

“Hi!”

Turning toward the chipper voice, Spike had to smile at Buffy as she stood in front of him, looking so refreshingly young and wholesome in a pair of jeans and a sweater. Her hands were clasped behind her back and her ponytail was swinging lightly as she waited for an acknowledgment.

“Evening, pet,” he said with a grin, winding up the remainder of the extension cord.

“I would have been here earlier,” she said, walking past him and hopping up on the small stage that the band used for rehearsals. “But my little maggot of a boss put me on the early shift.”

“I would think that would be a good thing,” Spike said with a soft smile, leaning on the stage as he turned to face her.

“Nope,” she said, shaking her head. “All the tippers come in at night. It’s practically dead in there until midnight, and letting me off at ten is just his meager show of authority.”

“And what does he need to prove to you?” he asked, turning away from her to toss the cord onto the stage and boost himself up to sit next to her.

“That he’s the almighty higher power as far as I’m concerned, and if I would just go on a date with him, he’ll make my life easier.”

Glancing down at the floor, Spike took a deep breath. “And…what do you say to him?”

“That he’s a sleaze who only looks at girls and sees one thing and that’s how to get between their legs,” Buffy replied with a smile. “What did you think I would say?” she asked, leaning over and bumping her shoulder against Spike’s.

“I don’t know,” he replied with a smile of his own. “And you still have a job?”

“Surprisingly,” she said with a laugh.

Spike was mildly surprised that they had fallen into such an effortless rapport, but he wasn’t about to question it. Unfortunately, he was the only one who had that thought.

“So, um…what’s going on? With us…I mean?” she asked hesitantly. “Are we friends?”

“Is that what you want?” he countered nervously.

“Well…you were the one who asked me here to watch the rehearsal. I guess I thought…”

“I want that if you do, pet,” he whispered, wishing that he had the right to want more from her.

“I’d like that,” she said with a smile, looking around the area. “What’s going on tonight?”

“Nothing much,” Spike replied, hopping down from the stage. “Told the guys to go ahead and take off. I just have to turn out the lights and then I’m free.”

“Would you…want to go do something?” Buffy asked, biting her lip as she waited for his answer.

“What’d you have in mind, pet?” he asked, tilting his head to study her with a soft smile.

“I don’t know,” she said with a shrug. “You wanna take a walk or something?”

“I’m thinking the ‘or something’ is probably the safer bet. Don’t really fancy walking the streets of L.A. this time of night.”

“Okay then,” she said, hopping down from her seat. “Where to?”

“Let me lock up and we’ll figure it out.”

“Bathroom?” Buffy asked, looking around the area.

“Around the corner,” Spike said, smiling when Buffy walked off with a bounce in her step. “I’ll meet you outside, Goldilocks.”

“Alright,” she called over her shoulder as Spike shut off the lights, leaving one row on as he grabbed his coat, pulling it on as he walked out the door.

“I was beginning to wonder if you’d ever come out.”

Feeling his blood turn to ice water in his veins, Spike froze. His hands still up around his neck as he adjusted his collar before slowly straightening, he turned toward the familiar voice.

“What are you doing here, Dru?”

“I’ve come to see my sweet William,” the brunette murmured as she approached.

Spike gulped as he looked into her hypnotic eyes, quickly breaking away from her gaze. “You shouldn’t be here,” he muttered, glancing nervously at the building.

“I missed you,” she whispered, sidling up to him and letting her hands run over his chest.

“I didn’t miss you,” he replied, catching her hands in his and taking a step away from her.

“My sweet Spike. He’s all turned upside down. You need to be put on the right track. Come…Mummy will put you right.”

“No,” Spike growled, shaking his head. “I’m not like that anymore. I’ve changed. I’m not going back to that.”

Hearing the door open behind him, Spike briefly closed his eyes as he let go of Dru’s hands and turned to face Buffy.

“Am I interrupting something?” she asked, glancing back and forth between the two. She couldn’t stop the jealous feelings from creeping up inside of her as she studied their body language.

“No,” Spike said, glancing at Drusilla.

“She’s the reason,” Dru said angrily. “You’re all covered in the girl and she won’t let my Spike out to play.”

“Go home, Dru,” Spike muttered, walking over to Buffy and taking her hand in his. He thought he saw a brief sense of relief flash in her eyes, but he knew he had to be imagining things. “I don’t want to see you anymore,” he called over his shoulder. “I’m not the same.”

“No,” she whispered, shaking her head. “You’re not.”

Not sparing her a second glance, Spike led Buffy to his car, opening the door and gesturing for her to get in. Buffy did so with a worried look on her face, watching as the other woman turned and walked away, she waited until they had been driving for a few minutes before saying anything.

“Am I supposed to keep quiet or are you going to talk to me?”

“What do you want to talk about?” he asked quietly.

“Spike,” she replied in a warning tone.

“Alright,” he muttered, turning the car toward her apartment building. “We’ll talk…I’ll tell you whatever you want to know.”




Thanks so much to: spuffette, melissa, Mari, Alicia, TammyAsh666, lara, Cordykitten, Franchesca, VamptasticA, tahmoe, Sevvy_O, Laine, stace, gypsy_jin, BuffyandSpikeForever, H, Caitie, starhawk, spikes slayer, pj, Nyah Ambrose, dreamgirl4eva, Caroline, & Bint for reviewing!





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