Buffy stared at the ceiling unable to sleep and trying to figure out what in the world had just happened between her and Spike. How could she have let herself get so aroused? How could she have gone so weak under his touch that she was unable to hide her lustful reaction to him? And more importantly, why couldn’t she stop thinking about how much she wanted to do it again? She should have been smarter than that. She should have known that he was just teasing her, testing her.
The sound of voices brought her out of her reverie and she walked over to the banister to spy onto the living room below to see what was going on. She saw Willow, Xander and Anya walking through the front door and heard them asking about her whereabouts.
“So, where’s the buffster?” Xander asked, clasping his hands together.
“Upstairs. She’s sleeping.” Spike said coldly. This whole game he was playing with Buffy was making him severely frustrated, sexually and otherwise.
“Well, let’s get her down here! We’ve got work to do. We have to go over the game plan. It’s not my fault that the only time we can have a meeting is in the middle of the night.” Xander said.
“I’ll go up and get her.” Willow volunteered.
Buffy saw Willow heading toward the stairs and she quickly raced back to the bed and got under the covers to feign sleep so she wouldn’t know she was watching over them the whole time.
After climbing the stairs, Willow looked toward the bed to see Buffy lying under the covers. She cautiously walked over to the bed and noticed that her eyes were open.
“Buffy, you’re awake.” Willow observed
“Yeah.” Buffy said, her tone crestfallen.
“What’s wrong?” Willow’s expression immediately turned into one of concern.
“I have to tell you something.” Buffy sat up and stared at Willow, wondering if she should confide in her.
“What is it, Buffy?”
“I’m a little afraid to tell you. I’m afraid you might freak out.”
“You know you can tell me anything. I promise to have an open mind.”
Buffy paused, still unsure of the secret she was about to reveal. “I think I’m becoming attracted to Spike.” She cringed and waited for Willow’s reaction.
Willow’s eyes widened and her mouth opened slightly as if she were about to say something but thought twice about it.
“I……um……I” Willow stumbled over her thoughts and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear as she avoided Buffy’s eyes.
“Oh God!” Buffy exclaimed, putting her head in her hands in utter embarrassment.
Sitting next to Buffy, Willow tried to show her comfort and support by gently patting her back. “I’m sorry. I just didn’t know what to say.” She smiled meekly.
“I’m a freak!” Buffy cried, her head still resting in her hands.
“You’re not a freak. It’s not that bad. It’s probably just the situation you are in. I mean, I couldn’t imagine having to kiss someone and pretend to be close without feeling something.”
“Yeah but I think I started to feel something before all this started. I just didn’t want to admit it to myself.” Buffy raised her head to look at Willow.
“Oh.” Willow responded, uncomfortably “If I weren’t gay and if we didn’t see Spike when he was all evil, I might find him attractive.”
“Really?” Buffy questioned and Willow nodded. “Well, I guess that’s something.”
“And it’s not like anything is actually going to happen.” Willow assumed. “Finding someone attractive who is most likely bad for you isn’t the worst thing in the world unless you let it get the best of you. As long as you don’t act on it everything will be just fine.” She smiled reassuringly.
“Right.” Buffy said, unsure of herself. “You’re absolutely right.”
Willow stood up. “We better get downstairs. We have to talk strategy.”
“I’ll be there in a minute.” Buffy said.
As Willow walked down stairs to join the rest of the gang, Buffy remained on the bed and sighed deeply. Part of her was hoping that Willow would give her some kind of certificate of approval when it came to her attraction to Spike. She wanted someone to tell her that it was ok to want to kiss him. She wanted to hear that all the daydreams she had been having about him were no big deal. She wanted permission to have feelings for him and a thumbs up to the idea of going a little further than kissing. Her friends would never approve and most likely think she was completely out of her mind if she let things get any farther than they already had.
Buffy finally made her way downstairs but couldn’t bear to look at Spike or Willow. She knew Willow would be watching her actions toward Spike more closely now after what she had just told her. She suddenly wished she could go back in time five minutes and erase the entire conversation.
Trying to remain calm, she sat on the couch and faced her friends. Xander looked slightly grim as if he were about to deliver bad news.
“Xander, what’s wrong?” Buffy asked
“Well, the votes are in so far and you guys aren’t doing very well. Even Jason and Lorena who are barely speaking to each other are beating you two.”
“How can that be? We’ve been trying really hard.”
Anya spoke up. “Basically, you guys aren’t hot enough. You need more fire. Sex sells and you guys are lacking appeal. If you two don’t give the audience some hot and steamy action they are going to turn on you.”
Buffy pouted and glanced nervously at Spike. His bad mood caused him not to notice the look she was giving him. She was hoping he’d jump in with some helpful suggestions but the look on his face told her that he was a lost cause.
“We’ll work on it. Somehow we’ll win over the audience. We’ll think of something.” Buffy said.
“Good.” Willow responded. “Between you and me, Giles is getting a little bit nervous. Every time he checks to see how many votes you have, he starts to clean his glasses and we all know what that means.”
“Well, tell him not to worry. There is no way we are going to lose.”
Buffy’s last statement got Spike’s attention and he turned to look at her, eyebrow raised. She ignored him though and kept her attention on her friends.
“We better head on home now, Buff.” Xander said standing up. “Good luck. You are going to need it.”
“Thanks a lot.” Buffy said dryly before giving her friends goodbye hugs.
After they left, she looked at Spike out of the corner of her eye and saw him staring at her. She didn’t want to have a conversation about their little make out session. Slowly turning around, she made her way over to the staircase to head up to bed, hoping that he wouldn’t try to talk to her.
“Buffy?”
She sighed in defeat and turned around. “Yeah?”
“Goodnight.”
“Goodnight Spike.”
When she realized that was all he was going to say, she quickly raced up the stairs and away from him. She couldn’t even put into words how relieved she was that he didn’t try to make her talk about her possible feelings for him. That was the last thing she thought she could handle right now.
As he watched her go up the stairs he became proud of himself. He didn’t let his emotions run away with him this time. He was sick and tired of trying to get Buffy to admit something that probably wasn’t even true. Chasing her was no longer an option. If she wants more than a relationship filled with indifference then she’s going to have to come to him from now on.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next night, while getting ready for Angela’s party, Buffy stared at herself in the mirror and began combing out her recently washed locks. She wiped off more fog from the mirror so she could see herself more clearly. Suddenly remembering that Spike can’t see his reflection, she wondered what it must be like not to be able to see yourself. It must be weird to stand in front of a mirror and see nothing.
At the same time, Spike was in the bathroom downstairs drying his hair with a towel. He looked over to where the mirror was and almost didn’t dare to go near it. Every single time he stood in front of something that was supposed to cast a reflection, he would become hopeful that maybe just once he would be able to see himself. He was disappointed every time. Even though he already knew what to expect, he stood in front of the mirror and once again saw nothing but the room behind him. He sighed and started to wonder what Buffy saw when she looked at him.
After putting the blow dryer away, Buffy began fidgeting with her hair and began to put it up so she could show off her neck just the way Spike liked it. When she realized what she was doing, she looked incredulously at her reflection in the mirror and let her hair fall amongst her shoulders. Noises coming from the first floor startled her enough to make her jump. She followed the sounds, stopping when she got to the outside of the bathroom door which was already open a crack. She peeked in to see Spike struggling with his hair and growling in frustration. Buffy giggled and Spike turned to look at her.
“Something I can do for you, luv?” Spike asked.
“What in the world are you doing?” Buffy questioned, grinning.
“What does it look like? I’m trying to fix my bloody hair but it’s a little difficult to do that without a reflection.”
“Why don’t you just fix it like you always do?”
“I don’t know. I just wanted to make it a little different this time. I usually just slick it back because it’s easy, no mirror required.”
Buffy giggled again when she noticed how disheveled his hair was. It looked like there were a million strands sticking up in every possible direction.
“If all you are going to do is stand there and laugh at me, I’d much rather prefer it if you’d leave.” He said, irritated.
“Stop being such a baby and come here.” Buffy ordered pointing a finger down toward the floor in front of her.
Spike obeyed and when he reached her she put her hand on his shoulders and pushed him down until he was sitting on the toilet seat. She then straddled his legs so she could get easier access to his hair. Instinctively, his arms wrapped around her while she began running her fingers through his platinum locks.
Closing his eyes to savor the moment, he wished they could stay like this forever. It felt so good to have his arms wrapped around her and the feel of her fingernails gently scraping against his scalp was like heaven.
Buffy looked at Spike and noticed closed eyes and a contented expression. He looked so sweet and innocent but she knew in the back of her mind that he was anything but. Things have changed so much in the past couple of years that it was almost impossible for her to imagine him hurting anyone. For over a century he was an evil murderer but something in her brain refused to believe that every time she looked at him.
When her movements paused, he opened his eyes to look at her. Their eyes met and he wanted nothing more than to kiss her. Buffy smiled at him as she inspected the new look she had given him. Her eyes drifted back to his and the look on his face made her nervous. His eyes kept drifting toward her lips and she froze at the thought of what was to come. His head tilted toward her to capture her lips in a kiss but as he moved further forward, Buffy backed away and stood up.
“We better get going. We don’t want to be late.” Buffy said in an overly cheery tone to cover her nervousness. “And don’t worry, your hair looks great.” She rushed out the door after that leaving Spike feeling like the whole situation was completely hopeless.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~
Buffy observed Spike as they walked over to John and Angela’s cabin for the party. She looked at his hair with pride. While fixing his hair, she remembered how sweet he looked when it was curled slightly so she decided to fix his hair to her liking and now she couldn’t take her eyes off of him. He noticed her staring at him out of the corner of his eye but he decided not to ruin it by opening his big mouth and embarrassing her. Instead, he smirked to himself and enjoyed the fact that she was enjoying him.
Once they got to Angela’s cabin they rang the bell and waited outside while listening to laughter coming from the inside. Angela opened the door and greeted them with a large grin.
“Hi guys! Come on in!”
As they walked inside, they noticed that once again, Jason and Lorena were as far away from each other as they could possibly get. Lorena was talking to John and they noticed that for the first time since they met her, she had a smile on her face. Jason was on the other side of the room nursing an alcoholic beverage.
Spike and Buffy took a seat next to each other on the sofa and Angela took a seat next to Spike.
Angela looked up at Spike. “Oh! Let me fix that for you.” She immediately started running her fingers through his hair and started spiking it up, ruining the very hairdo that Buffy spent so much time trying to perfect. It took everything she had not to wrestle Angela to the ground. She felt anger flare up in her gut and she wanted nothing more than to punch her out if she didn’t get her hands off of Spike immediately.
“Buffy!” Angela exclaimed. “I love your outfit! Those pants were all the rage when I was in high school five years ago!” Her sarcastic comment made Buffy’s anger flare up even more.
“Well, you know Angela, I really love your outfit too. I think I saw it on a hooker a few weeks ago.” Buffy showed Angela a toothy grin.
Looking over at Buffy, Spike’s eyes widened with amazement and amusement. He decided to intervene before things got worse. “So, Angela, what’s the plan for tonight?” His question also got the attention of the rest of the room. They all awaited her answer.
“Well…..” She began with a saucy grin. “I was thinking about a little game of truth or dare.”
“Truth or dare?” Buffy scoffed. “Isn’t that a little childish?”
“Not the way I play it.” Angela used a sexy tone as she eyed Spike. “I’m gonna start and I pick Buffy. Buffy, truth or dare?”
Buffy could see by the look on Angela’s face that she expected her to chicken out and pick truth. Instead, Buffy looked her straight in the eyes and said, “Dare.”
Angela grinned an evil grin and her eyes started to dart back and forth between Buffy and Spike which was beginning to make Buffy nervous.
“I dare you and Spike to give each other an orgasm without the removal of any clothing and without touching any skin that isn’t already exposed.”
Buffy’s eyes widened and she looked at Spike like a deer caught in the headlights. “You want us to what?”
“Don’t act like you’ve never heard the word before.”
“Of course I have but you want us to do that in front of everyone?”
“Well, yeah that’s kind of the point.”
Spike stood up. “Come on Buffy, let’s go home.” Spike could see she was uncomfortable with the entire situation and that taking her out of there was the best option. He offered her his hand and she took it. She stood and they started to make their way toward the door.
“See John, what did I tell you? These two aren’t for real.” Angela said.
Buffy turned around and looked at her coldly. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“I’ve been getting a weird feeling about you two. It seems like you are trying so hard to convince us that you are a hot couple but so far I’ve seen no evidence of it. I think you two are just pretending to like each other so you have a chance at winning. You just want the gold at the end of the rainbow because you know these shows usually give big prizes or money at the end.” Angela accused.
“That may be why you’re here but it’s not why we’re here.” Buffy retaliated.
“Prove it.” Angela hissed.
“Fine. We’ll do it.” Buffy said, grabbing Spike’s hand and leading him over to the couch.
“Buffy, we don’t have to.” Spike said, whispering in her ear.
“Yes we do.”
She shoved him onto the sofa and straddled him much like she did in the bathroom while fixing his hair. It was more intimate this time. Her body and his body were tangled together with no room in between. Spike instantly hardened and Buffy gasped at the sensation.
“Buffy, what are you doing?”
“Trust me.” She whispered.
Suddenly, she smashed her lips to his and he tightened his grip around her. She stared moving her hips in a circular motion that made Spike groan. Their lips parted and their breathing became heavy as she continued to move against him. His hands traveled up and down her back and he wished he could slide his hands under her shirt to feel her hot skin but the dare wouldn’t allow it.
He reached around the back of her head to pull her into another kiss. He pulled her as close to him as he possibly could but no matter how hard their bodies smashed together, it still wasn’t close enough. His tongue swept through her mouth as the kiss deepened. Buffy was still grinding herself into him in a way that made him crazy with lust.
When she started moaning, he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold on much longer. She grabbed onto his forearms as her little mewls of pleasure continued and with every swing of her hips, her mewls became louder. Her body started to shiver as did his and they both knew their release was coming. They both let out strangles cries as orgasmic bliss set in. They parted slightly and panted, their eyes still closed. They were drowning in each other but the feeling was interrupted when Angela started to speak.
“Ok, party is over.” She said with open-mouthed shock. “John, let’s go to bed.” Arousal was clear in her voice as she pulled John into the bedroom with her and shut the door.
Reality came flooding back to Buffy and she opened her eyes and gave a wide-eyed and confused look to Spike. Panic suddenly filled her features and she scrambled off of him and ran out the door, leaving Spike sitting on the sofa completely dazed.
To Be Continued…………..
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