Author's Chapter Notes:
woo hoo another chapter!!
Chapter 30

Buffy paced across the kitchen floor absentmindedly nibbling on one of her nails. She was trying to understand what she believed she heard. What was going on with Spike and Fred? Are they fighting? Did they break up? But more importantly, where does that leave her—them? “I bet it's because of that hottie at the bookstore. Or is it because of me? Oh, let it not be because of me.” Buffy groaned.

She knew she ought not get her hopes up, but she couldn't help but smiled to herself as she thought of Spike's change in behavior towards her. He was finally willing to talk to her. She willed her face to sober up as she heard him approach.

Spike burst into the room full of nervous energy. “I'm sorry about that.” Spike made his way back to his coffee, tasting it and then putting the cup right back down. Spike began pacing back and forth across the small room as he continued. “He had no right talking to you like that. My problems with Fred have nothing to do with you.”

Spike sat in front of his coffee cup and waited for her to speak. Buffy sat back in her seat and absentmindedly stirring her coffee reminded him that she didn't know what he was talking about.

“Fred and I broke up yesterday.” He emptied his cup and stood up as if to go get another. After a moment he sat back down. Staring at the empty coffee cup he sighed.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked tentatively. “We use to be able to talk--it wasn't about me or anything?” She looked at him horrified. “I hope I didn't cause you and Fred any problems, that was never my intentions.

Spike snorted and raise his hand in a dismissive wave, “no it's not about you.

“Is it about someone else and Fred” She asked quietly.

Spike turned his sharp blue eyes on her and asked, “what aren't you telling me, Buffy.”

“Well, remember when I came in before and I asked you about telling secrets?” To his blank stare she continued, “that sometime what we have to say and our motives for telling can be at war with one another. And in the end you question yourself so much and your motive can be viewed as so bad, that you end up not sharing at all?”

“Stop me if any of this is making sense.” she said sarcastically.

“Honestly I just remember you blathering on about something and you making my head hurt.” Buffy smiled at him ruefully.

“I had a moral dilemma about something that could effect your life and while I'm all with the spillage you hearing what? Bees buzzing?” She looked at him with a put upon attitude and he sheepishly shrugged his shoulders.

“Pet, I drank a lot last night.”

Buffy giggled into her hand but sobered up almost instantly thinking of Fred and her mystery man.

“Fred had—has this Professor that she just couldn't seem to get away from. They work in the same department in the same dark corners on the same dusty books and no matter how many times I told her he was still interested in her-- hell still in love with her. She wouldn't stop spending time with him. We circled this same issue repeatedly, neither willing to give up. Well last night she informed me that she and the Professor will be headed off to the mother land for three bleeding months.” Spike stopped suddenly. He gazed out the window as he whispered. “Once I asked her to go to England with me for a holiday,” he turned his blue eyes back to Buffy. “Said her schedule wouldn't allow it.” Spike looked down at the empty cup in his hands. “I need something stronger then this,” he laughed sadly.

Buffy covered his hand with her own. “I think you've had enough,” she said softly. Spike looked down at their joined hands and then up into her eyes. The double meaning was not lost on either of the blonds. Spike cleared his throat and stood up suddenly.

“What were you going on about when you came here earlier—you know the buzzing bees.” he asked busying himself cleaning up the table.

Buffy smiled at him sarcastically before answering, “you know what, it's no big deal. Forget about it.” She looked down at her watch and started, “Crap! I got to go. I promised to meet Cordelia for lunch. And you know how the princess doesn't like to be kept waiting.” She turned to grab her bag. Spike place a hand on her shoulder and she said, “thanks for everything..... This was nice, kinda like before....everything.” Buffy voice trailed off as they stood in staring at each other.

“Are you gonna finish that,” Buffy asked in a quiet voice. Spike looked down at the bottle of warm tea in his hand.

He turned the bottle over in his hands a few times and tossing it in the garbage answered “No I do believe I'm finished with it.” He smiled at her softly and walked her to the door.

Spike opened the door and before Buffy walked through she stopped and looked at him for a moment. “What?” he breathed.

“Nothing....I guess I'll just umm talk to you later.” The door clicked softly behind Buffy, as she made her way down the stairs. She was sure to make her steps casual. “Just take your time, girl,” she sung quietly to herself. “Slow and steady, no big deal.” When she stopped at her car, she peeked looked over her shoulder. All was still save the curtain in the bay window. Did the curtain move or was it just the wind? Buffy let her hair fall across her face to hide the small smile that played on her lips. Just then her phone rang, snapping her back to the present. “Way to ruin a moment, Cordy,” she muttered as she hopped in her car assuring the former beauty queen she was on her way.

From inside the house Spike let the curtain fall back into place as he watched Buffy speed off. Shaking his head he walked upstairs to shower.





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