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Chapter 8: Chapter 7: Hold me
Chapter 7: Hold Me


He didn’t know what was happening to him. He didn’t know what was going on. He didn’t know why he was rocking her back and forth in his arms, hours after she had fallen asleep. He didn’t know why he had an almost uncontrollable urge to kill everyman who had dared to touch her.

He closed his eyes and sighed. Yes. He knew the answer to that last question.

Back and forth.

Back and forth.

Back and forth.

It was because she was becoming his. He had been compensated for a task he had yet to complete—a task he knew he'd be unable to complete.

He looked down at her back once again and shuddered.

Scars. Ones that ran deep.

Ones like his.

He didn’t have any tolerance for men who hit women. She was so small wrapped up in his arms, pressed against his body, seeking protection and strength and he wondered who could harm something as tiny and defenseless as her.

He almost laughed out loud at that thought. Defenseless? She was anything but-- if the pain in his shoulder had anything to say about it. She was so full of life and he envied her that. It was something that hummed through her body and shone in her eyes. That life giving quality that each person had. Something that had died in him the day he lost everything that ever really truly mattered, something that was long gone and worlds past. Something he’d give anything to get back.

Maybe it wasn't only him that was going to do the saving in the circumstance.

She stirred and he stilled, not wanting to wake her, knowing she needed her rest. As gently as he could he stood up, groaning when his shoulder protested, and carried her over to his bed, laying her down between the sheets-- which were still rumpled and blood stained from earlier.

Covering her, he stood there for a long moment, watching her sleep. He wasn’t really thinking of anything, just admiring her beauty. Her long golden hair splayed out across his pillows, her little crooked nose sprinkled with the tiniest freckles. Everything thing about her was petite and small. She looked like a child-- all cuddled up beneath his sheets. Who was he kidding? He should have gotten out of the mercenary business a long time ago. Piracy was more his shtick. Kept him from falling into things like this.

He knew her secret now. Why she didn’t leave when she had the chance. Why when faced with death she looked at him boldly, without a trace of fear. She was a forced to be reckoned with. A beguiling force that radiated red hot life but there was also something in her that was dark, a desperate weary soul that would welcome death.

He ran a hand through his wavy hair. Of course he didn’t know what had really happened to her but scars like those told a story on their own. He took one last look at her and walked toward the door needing to get back to his men. They would reap the consequences of their actions.

You didn’t touch something that belonged to him and get away with it.

~+~

“ELIZABETH!?!?!” He roared and she coward behind her dressing table, please God don’t let him find her-- not today.

Not ever.

“Where are you-- you little whore?” His voice was coming closer and she knew that tonight, like most other nights would be no different than the first.

“You come out now or it will be ten times worse! You hear me girl? You don’t make me find you!” He was in her bedroom now, knocking things over, breaking items he had given to her, bribes so that she would keep her mouth shut. She knew that they'd meant nothing. That even if she were to utter a word about the things that went on behind the closed doors of their estate no one would believe her. Her father had made sure to ruin her credibility among other things.

His footsteps got closer and then slowed. She knew that he had found her and she held her breath hoping that he would walk away-- knowing that he wouldn't. He turned to entire dressing table over on its side and grabbed her by her hair. “You stupid bitch!”

She didn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry. She closed her eyes tight and prayed for a quick beating and a rescuer. Ever since her mother left she'd been subject to his wicked scorn and seething anger.

She prayed for a savior that never came.

“Elizabeth! Hush, come on now luv that’s enough.” Spike had been shaking her for minutes but she was stuck in the throws of a nightmare. He had come back into the room after getting his crew in order and decided that his bed was big enough for the both of them so he climbed in next to her only to be awakened a few hours later by her screaming at an invisible foe.

He was exasperated. He didn’t know what else to do to try and calm her. He was just about to give up and go get Giles when she froze.

She laid still but her breathing was still erratic. He ran his fingers across her forehead, brushing hair out of her face and was surprised to see her cheeks wet with tears. He decided to leave her alone and let her sleep, he’d talked to her about the nightmares in the morning.

He rolled back over to his side of the bed and shut his eyes, they set sail tomorrow. He couldn’t wait to get away from England and get back to the sea. He needed time to think-- something that wasn't going to happen while he was stuck on land with the lubbers.

He sucked in his stomach and held his breath not knowing what to do when he felt her small arms encircle his waist. He certainly wasn't expecting that.

“You’re here.” He heard her whisper. He couldn’t get anything out but a nod but that seemed to be good enough because she snuggled closer. “I need you to hold me.”

He thought it was odd that they had already struck up such a candor with each other and obliged her. He never would have thought that this deal would turn out the way it had. He was totally and utterly screwed-- was his last thought before he fell asleep.






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