Chapter 4:
“Sweetheart, is everything alright?” Joyce asked her daughter as soon as she walked through the door.
“I‘m fine, Mom” Buffy smiled sadly. “Just remembering Dawnie.” A lone tear slipped down her cheek.
Joyce wrapped her arms around her daughter and held her tight. The memory of her deceased daughter coming to mind. Buffy had blamed herself for so long for what had happened to Dawn. Joyce had tried to explain that it wasn’t her fault, that it was Dawnie’s time to go and that everything happened for a reason. Still the blonde had locked herself in her room for days, not speaking to anyone.
“It wasn’t your fault,” Joyce whispered just before releasing her daughter.
“I know,” Buffy smiled sadly and made her way to her bedroom. Spike and Dru had been standing off to the side, neither of them knowing what to say. Joyce had a distant look on her face.
“C’mon,” Dru whispered, dragging Spike down the hall and all but threw him into Buffy’s room.
“Hey,” Buffy said softly. She was sitting cross-legged on her bed hugging a pillow to her chest.
“Uh- hey” Dru had continued walking down the hall and dashed into Spike’s room. She was now leaning against the wall that separated his and Buffy’s room, her ear pressed to the wood.
The silence seemed to go on forever, the two never making eye contact. ‘I’m gonna kill Dru,’ Spike thought nervously running a hand through his hair. “I‘ll just-” he motioned to the door and started to make his way towards it.
“Spike…” Spike turned around at hearing her hesitant voice.
“Yeah, pet?”
“Th-thanks for before,” she smiled at him. “I needed to let it all out..”
“Anytime, luv” He smiled turning and walking out of her room. Buffy turned and reached under her pillow for her notepad and started to write.
He looks around the room,
Innocently overlooks the truth,
Shouldn’t a light go on?
Doesn’t he know that I’ve had him memorized for so long?
He sees everything black and white
Never let nobody see him cry
I don’t let nobody see me wishing he was mine
I could tell you his favourite colour’s blue
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth
His sister's beautiful, he has his father’s eyes
And if you asked me if I love him
I’d lie
Dru sighed in defeat pulling away from the wall. Her brother was the world’s biggest idiot. Shaking her head, she walked out of his room and down the hall, a plan already forming in her head.
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“We’re running late already. If you’re not down here in the next five minutes, I‘m bloody leaving you behind!” Spike yelled up the stairs to his sister and Buffy.
They’d made reservations at the local Italian restaurant in town. Giles and Joyce had gone already, wanting to do some shopping before they had dinner.
“We’re coming, we’re coming,” Buffy sighed walking down the stairs quickly, Dru not far behind. Dru smiled upon seeing Spike’s blank stare. She’d chosen Buffy’s outfit for the night. Buffy was wearing a white shirt-type dress that hung off one shoulder. The dress clung to her every curve and finished mid thigh. Her hair was out framing her face, which was covered in light makeup.
“You look nice,” Spike smiled opening the front door for her. Buffy blushed and ducked her head. Dru just giggled and followed her brother and Buffy out the door and to his car.
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“We were beginning to think you weren‘t coming,” Joyce smiled softly at her daughter as the trio took to their seats inside the cosy Italian restaurant.
“I couldn’t find my shoes.” Dru tucked a napkin onto her lap. Their table was a booth table. Giles and Joyce sat on one side of the booth while Buffy, Spike and Dru sat on the other. Buffy closest to the wall, Spike next to her.
“Well, it‘s good that you did because we were going to have to leave.” Giles laughed. “We had to send the waitress away a few times without our orders.” Speaking of the devil, said waitress came back over.
“Are you ready to order?” She was young maybe about 19 with short brown hair. She pulled a pen and notepad from her apron pouch. Grazing the table, her eyes landed on Spike and she sent him a flirtatious smile. He wasn’t looking, instead helping pass a napkin to Buffy.
“I think so,” Joyce said looking around at everyone who nodded in a agreement. After all the orders were made, the young waitress sent another flirtatious smile at Spike and said she would be back with their drinks soon.
“Are you doing ok luv?” Spike asked softly once chatter had begun at the table.
“I’m ok. I don’t really want to talk about it.” Buffy didn’t meet his gaze. Spike nodded and turned his head, hurt that she didn’t want to talk to him. Buffy, seeing his quick look continued, “Not-not that I don’t appreciate you asking. I-I do,” She smiled hesitantly.
“I get it luv. You don’t have to explain it.” Spike turned his attention to Giles, who was chattering enthusiastically about a certain bookstore he’d come across this afternoon whilst shopping.
“Can um…Can we-” Buffy started but turned her attention to the few dots of salt she’d found on the table in front of her.
“Huh?” Spike asked.
“Can we talk later?” Buffy looked up at him. “I kind of miss it.” She looked down again. “Miss talking to you.”
“I‘d like that.” Spike replied, not even noticing the waitress who’d come back with their drinks, and who was practically leaning the whole length of the table just to pass his drink to him.
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Dinner conversation had been kept light, the events of the afternoon not being brought up. Dawn wasn’t talked about much unless they were at home or with close friends. The memory of her was still too painful.
Joyce sat watching the interaction between Spike and Buffy, noticing her daughter’s slight glow as Spike was telling her a joke. She watched as Buffy’s entire face lit up as she broke out into yet another fit of giggles. A laugh she hadn’t heard in a very, very long time.
“Nooo!” Buffy laughed not believing it.
“I’m deadly serious,” Spike laughed, wiping the tears from his eyes.
“I remember that,” Dru laughed shaking her head.
“That’s so sad, I mean why didn’t they tell anyone,? To be found out like that…” Buffy laughed.
“Don’t know, pet.”
“I’ll tell you why. The school is full of a bunch of homophobes. There’s nothing wrong with same sex relationships. Jonathan and Andrew should be proud of their sexual preferences, not afraid to be themselves in front of their fellow classmates.” Giles said sternly.
“Hear hear!” Dru laughed holding up her glass of Diet Coke.
“It is sad that they have to hide themselves,” Joyce said, taking a sip of her wine. “People are so cruel these days.”
Buffy sat quietly remembering hearing Harmony and Cordelia outing the two teenagers in front of the whole school. Spike had told her about the two of them being caught kissing outside of the school hall.
“People will do anything for popularity these days,” she whispered to herself. Spike winced at her words, painful memories being brought back.
“Cheque please!” Giles said to the waitress, who walked past their booth.
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The ride home was made in silence. Buffy was drained. The afternoon’s events tearing her down emotionally. Dru sat in the back of the Desoto as usual, staring out the window at the stars. Buffy stared out her own window, wondering if Dawn was up there watching over her.
Spike pulled into the cabin’s driveway and parked the car. He was nervous and excited at the same time. Buffy had told him she wanted to talk. This is your chance mate, fix what happened. Don’t bloody blow it.
“I’m wiped. I’m going to bed,” Dru yawned opening the front door and trudging her way up the stairs to her room.
“You, uh- wanted to talk?” Spike asked, walking behind Buffy as they made their way upstairs.
“Ye-ah,” Buffy yawned holding her hand across her mouth. Her hair was tousled and her eyes droopy already, laced with the need to sleep. Spike took in her appearance and sighed.
“You look tired, pet.” He pointed to her door, “Get some sleep yeah? We‘ll talk tomorrow.” He started to back away, retreating to his own room. Buffy frowned slightly and sighed. She was really tired, but at the same time she desperately wanted to talk to Spike. With a small nod she opened her door.
“Buffy,”
“Yeah?” She turned.
“You looked beautiful tonight,” he smiled before shutting his door.
He stands there then walks away
My god if I could only say
I’m holding every breath for you…
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By pixiecorn at 2008-09
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By pixiecorn at 2008-09Author's Chapter Notes:
A MASSIVE thank you goes out to Lauriel for taking the time to beta this chapter for me on such short notice. You’re a life saver.
Also, thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed so far: 3xy, Jess, JO, Aurelia Carlisle, and Fallinfaery.
Oh and the picture used in this chapter... is where I got the idea of Buffy's shirt type dress.
(I photomanipulated the picture myself:))
Also, thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed so far: 3xy, Jess, JO, Aurelia Carlisle, and Fallinfaery.
Oh and the picture used in this chapter... is where I got the idea of Buffy's shirt type dress.
(I photomanipulated the picture myself:))
Chapter End Notes:
Mwahaha, bet your all sitting on the edge of your seat trying to figure out what’s going to happen next.:)
Don't forget to leave a review.... i love them.... and my muse loves them even more... so start typing away:)
Don't forget to leave a review.... i love them.... and my muse loves them even more... so start typing away:)