Previously ...
…His eyes snapped open. Instead of seeing his fingers twisted in hair dark as night they were buried in hair that looked like spun sunshine. Smiling up at him around his cock was…
‘Buffy?’
Spike bolted up in the bed. He whipped his head around desperately trying to remember where the hell he was. The heartbeat ringing in his ears reminded him.
There she was the devil in his dream. Buffy was stretched out beside him; the covers had dipped a little and a perky breast had been uncovered. It was teasing him. Begging him to lick, suck and nibble.
A slight moan escaped her lips, he remembered Drusilla. Anger and frustration filled him. Throwing the covers off, he stormed into the bathroom.
Spike was leaning over the porcelain basin his knuckles white from clutching the bowl, his chest was heaving as he tried to rein in his fear, and anger.
That blonde Barbie had invaded his dreams. Sucking in a deep breath, he stared deep into the mirror. Images of Drusilla flashed in his mind, silky black hair as dark as the night, a wicked smile that hinted of better things to come.
Guilt flooded him, Dru was his dark princess, and she was his lover, his savoir. She was his world, but now that infuriating bint in the next room, the very same bitch that was currently sleeping in his bed, was swallowing his thoughts and dreams.
A tortured cry from the other room pulled him from his self-imposed guilt trip.
All thoughts of Drusilla fled his mind when he saw Buffy. She was balled tightly her face flushed red and stained from tears. Her fingers tearing into the thin cotton sheets as she desperately tried to crawl away from whatever was chasing her.
Spike called to her, slowly pulling her from her slumber. Buffy woke to the melodic voice of Spike, glad to finally, leave her nightmare behind she sat up and roughly wiped at the tears she had unknowingly shed in her sleep.
‘You alright pet?’ concern ebbing its way into his tone.
‘Ah sorry I was having a…dream’ the quiver in her voice not hiding the truth.
‘Sounded more like a nightmare to me’ he quirked an eyebrow at her.
‘You wanna tell me bout it?’ He slipped into the bed beside her.
She wrapped her body around his and rested her head on his bare chest, the coolness of his skin calming the burning of her cheeks.
‘It was Angel; he was at the Bronze, my friends were there too. We were dancing, he…he said I killed him and he told me to go to hell.’
Her voice became soft; the shudder in her breath signifying how much this dream affected her. ‘Because he had.’
Silence followed her retelling.
Bleedin mongrel can’t let the girl go, can he? Made an art out of taunting her when he was here, now that he’s gone and she thinks she can get 5 minutes peace he starts making cameos in her dream…That’s it…it was just a dream.
Spike pulled her closer and held her a little tighter, for whose comfort he wasn’t quiet sure. ‘It was just a dream luv, he can’t get you now, and you’re safe here with me. It was just a dream.’
I know somewhere in the rational thinking part of my brain I know Angel can’t hurt me anymore. But I still can't help the feeling that I’ll turn around and he’ll be there, just waiting for me, waiting for the perfect moment to settle the score.
if that day ever came around I know for some reason, a reason that’s just too weird for me to analyse right now, I know that Spike would have my back. I feel safe with Spike, it’s like for the first time since I’ve been called I feel safe.
‘I know and Spike, thank you’
Spike placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head. Both slipped into a deep dreamless sleep.
The sun was slowly setting over the horizon. Steam rose from the cup of hot cocoa that Buffy clutched in her two hands. She could hear the foot steps of spike as he packed their things.
She pondered the past few days. Her hand wandered up to her neck. Her index finger slowly danced across the scar that had formed there.
Things had gone completely different to how she had imagined it would.
She thought that when they pulled up at this dingy motel, they would part ways.
She would of course give him the mandatory, if I see you again I’ll stake you spiel and he would roll his eyes and say yeah and if I see you again I’ll kill you, they would then part ways never to see each other again.
He to parts unknown and she would probably end up serving overweight creeps in a hick diner somewhere.
Instead here she was waiting for him to pack what was left of their belongings, so they could take the next step in their new journey together.
The door opened, spike had his duffel slung over his shoulder and hers at his side.
‘Ready pet?’
She smiled at him. ‘Yeah, let’s go.’
Sunnydale
The Scooby’s sat around the table at the library, their faces painting a thousand words about their loss. It had been just over two weeks since Buffy skipped town.
Xander was mindlessly flipping through a book when Giles burst through the library doors. He had his overnight bag in one hand and a plane ticket in the other.
‘Whoa G-man, slow down’
Dropping his bag Giles snapped at the brunette. ‘I have asked you not call me that’ he turned to face Willow.
‘Now, I received a call from a friend in Orlando. A young girl was seen fighting a nest of vampires.’
Taking off his glasses so that he didn’t have to see the doubtful looks from the children he continued.
The description didn’t fully meet Buffy’s, and Horatio said she was with a young man but it could possibly be our best lead yet’
Willows pained look spoke volumes. It was her job to play devils advocate. she hated it.
‘Giles this is all great and proactive in the search for Buffy but what makes you think that it is her this time? I mean what’s different from the last 100 best leads yet. I hate to say it because she was my best friend.’
A whispered ‘past tense’ from Xander had her correcting herself ‘is my best friend.’
The anguish and faded hope in the older mans eyes made her rethink her argument.
Sighing she went on. ‘All I’m trying to say is that we will find Buffy when she wants to be found. I think that whatever she had to go through with Angel must have been really hard on her and she just needs sometime to work it out.’
The stunned looks that she received from her audience made her blush.
‘I’m just saying okay? But if you think that this is her, I wish you happy Buffy hunting’
The urgency in Giles voice dissipated after hearing Willow’s line of reasoning.
‘Thank you Willow, it’s the not knowing if she is...’
Giles cut his sentence short, choosing not to finish the thought let alone giving it a voice. Every person in the room knew what he couldn’t say.
Xander spoke up. ‘Well we know that she is alive ‘cause no new slayer so that’s a plus. Right?’ he looked to Willow silently urging her to back him up.
A pained sigh slipped from Giles’ lips; placing his glasses back on his nose he turned from the bunch of misfits. He couldn’t let them see the tears threatening to invade his eyes.
‘Yes Xander, I suppose you are correct.’ Giles called from over his shoulder.
Somewhere on the open road
They had been driving most of the night. Buffy’s legs were starting to cramp and she needed to pee. When the dim glow of a rest stop came into view Buffy turned to face spike, his eyes fixed in the white lines passing under the car.
‘Can you pull up here please?’
He nodded, almost imperceptibly.
As Spike fuel up the car, Buffy filled up on sugary goodness.
Arms loaded with sweets and juice Buffy spied a pay phone, dumping the contents of her shopping spree unceremoniously on the back seat she silently turned from the car and made her way to the phone.
Her heart hammered in her chest and her hands shook so much that she was having a hard time putting the money into slot.
She was so preoccupied that she literally jumped when she felt Spikes hand on hers, he was helping her put the money in. She turn thankful eyes to him.
She dialed the number.
‘Hello. Hello?’
Buffy froze it was her mothers voice on the end of the line.
‘Who is this?’
Buffy tried to choke out a response ‘argk’
‘Buffy? Buffy is that you?’
‘Mom’ her voice barely a whisper
‘Oh god Buffy it’s so good to hear your voice. Are you okay?’
‘Yeah I am.’
The relief in her mother voice was so strong that Buffy felt it wash over her.
‘Where are you? I’ll come and get you.’
‘No! I mean, I’m…well I don’t know where I am...?’ she looked to Spike he shrugged.
Buffy heard the change in her mothers’ voice with just the sharp intake of her breath, gone was the soft loving mother and in her place was an irate disappointed parent.
‘What the hell do you mean you DON’T know?’
All the strength Buffy had found in hearing her mothers’ voice faded quickly.
Buffy’s voice became soft and apologetic; she sounded defeated ‘I’m sorry. We just started driving—’
Joyce cut her off. ‘No I’m so sorry honey. I didn’t mean to get all’ Joyce stopped her train of thought and let out a calming breath. The deep sigh came through loud on Buffy’s end.
‘You’re on a road trip. How’s that going?’
No answer, Buffy was lost in thought as she watched Spike head for the car.
Joyce could feel her daughter slipping away ‘I love Buffy.’
Deafening silence followed Joyce’s proclamation. Buffy couldn’t answer her mother, the words felt like poison in her mouth. To her they were the most lethal words she could ever hear or say.
She heard her mothers’ final plea
‘Come home soon’ a toxic thought echoed through her mind.
I don’t have a home anymore.
Buffy placed the phone back on it cradle cutting off anything else her mother might say. Through her tears, she stared at the inanimate object. Thoughts of her mother, her watcher, and her friends screamed through her mind.
Buffy’s thoughts were broken when she heard the roar of the De Soto’s engine. She turned from the phone to see that Spike had stepped out of the car and was watching her over the hood.
He was waiting for her, waiting for her to decided, go back to Sunnydale, or go with him.
She looked at the phone. Up until this point Buffy thought that once she spoke to her mother, ever thing would get better and she would go home, go back to Sunnydale.
The surreal drama she was currently playing out would end and life would go back to normal, she would go back to high school.
Giles would have her training and slaying again and her friends would well, be her friends. The coldness that filled her at the thought of going back made her shudder.
She looked back at the peroxide pest staring intently at her, his head slightly tilted and a ghost of a smile on his lips.
That’s when it hit her; her new life was staring at her.
‘Where to Slayer?’
‘You’re the driver.’
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Author's Chapter Notes:
A huge thanks to every one who has reviewed, your comments are my drug. A big sorry for taking sooooo long to update RL kinda got in the way...damned kids and their needs.