After Spike hung up the phone following his conversation with Buffy he felt like he needed to take a shower. He was aggravated, and determined to show her that he didn’t want to be with Dru.
He honestly couldn’t remember what had possessed him to let her stay, and he was kicking himself in the balls for it now. He had been so angry with her for the insensitivity she showed when she broke up with him. He didn’t even want to look at her.
After he got out of the shower he walked across his room and grabbed a pair of shorts from the dresser. He wouldn’t risk sleeping naked with Dru just on the other side of that wall.
Seconds after he slipped the silky material on, the person occupying his thoughts appeared, leering at him as she walked slowly into his room.
He nodded. “Dru.”
“You didn’t tell me you were a bad dog, Spike,” she said as she approached him.
He raised one eyebrow at her as she came to a stop, mere centimeters from his face. “What are you on about?”
Dru walked by the window, glancing up across the street to a sight that made her smile even more greedily then ever. “You didn’t tell me you were a bad dog while I was home. Dancing with sunshine,” she said as she reached up, smiled again, and closed the curtain.
Spike huffed. “Yeah, I did. What’s it to you?” he asked, thoroughly irritated with her and her crazy ranting already. He turned his back to her and tossed his towel into a hamper. Before he could turn back around, though, Dru had come up behind him and wrapped her arms around him possessively, running her hands across his clean, creamy flesh. “Dru, don’t,” he warmed.
“Spike,” she spoke softly, and her hands began to slide lower on his abdomen. “Let me make you feel good. You know I can. You know you want me to,” she smiled and snaked the tips of her fingers into the waistband of his shorts.
Spike clenched his jaw and grabbed her wrists firmly, pulling her away from him. “No, Dru, I really don’t.” He held her wrists as he moved away from her, and it pissed him off that she was still smirking at him.
“I’ll let you hurt me,” she leaned closer and whispered, “in all the wrong places…”
He shook his head and glared at her. “You know I don’t do that, Dru, and no. Not interested, not anymore.”
She pouted. “Why not?”
Spike clenched his jaw and shook his head. “How many times do we have to go through this, Dru! You dumped ME! I got over it, moved on.”
“To her!” she yelled suddenly, eyes blazing. “We don’t quite see eye to eye for a few weeks and you’ve already moved on! That’s not like you… William.”
“Oh you wanna talk about moving on? Like you moved on? Wes back home told me why you dumped me, Dru. Another guy? I wasn’t even gone three weeks and already you were moving on. Well you know what, now its my turn. There is no us.”
She looked furious, obviously not used to being rejected. “No!” she demanded. “You once told me we were eternal! You loved me, how can you just stop?!”
“I didn’t just stop! You helped me!” he said, trying not to yell. The last thing he wanted right now was his uncle coming up here and interjecting. “If you weren’t so heartless maybe part of me would still love you, but you helped me realize what a mistake it was to be with you.” He started to walk away but suddenly he turned back around and pointed toward his window. “And Buffy? She was the nail in the coffin for us, Dru. She made me realize what I had been missing out on with you. You don’t even compare to her.”
He glared at her as he backed away from her. He knew his words were pretty harsh, but at this point she needed to hear it or she would never learn. “I’m tired of this, Dru. I’m sorry, but I want you gone.”
She was upset, but Spike noted how she didn’t seem sad, just angry, and that only confirmed his suspicions that he was nothing but a play toy to her. A good roll in the sack.
“The sun’s burned you to ashes, Spike,” she said licking the tips of her fingers. “You taste like ashes.”
He simply chose to ignore her as she slowly walked past him and out into the hallway. He refused to look at her even though he could feel her eyes on him, beckoning him to spare a glance.
He was hurt, all over again. Not because he wanted his relationship with her, he was over and past that. But that his suspicions about their entire relationship together were confirmed. He was a toy. All the while he was showering her with everything she ever wanted from him and he loved her. She never loved him back. She never even said it to him in seriousness. Only with the response of ‘love you too, pet.’ She never once said it to him first.
Buffy said it to him.
“Goodbye, Spike,” Drusilla pouted as she walked out of his room and into the spare bedroom. Spike could only hope that when he got home from school tomorrow she would be gone.
“Bye, Dru,” he said quietly to himself. When he heard her door click shut he took a deep breath and made his way over to his door and locked it, then walked over to the side of his bed. He looked around for a moment then down at his feet. He bent down and reached under his bed, grabbing the same picture of Buffy he had hated only a day or so ago, and placed it back on his bedside table.
Once again, tomorrow was going to be a big day.
x X x X x
When Buffy woke up the next morning she decided she was going to have an edge to her. She wasn’t going to take shit from anyone and she sure as hell wasn’t going to let anyone get to her.
Dressed in a flattering pink tank top and skirt, she parted her hair to the side and subtly tucked the front strands behind her ears. It was simple, but elegant. She could still be pretty without going overboard like Cordelia.
She was done. Done being the doe-eyed hurt school girl who lost all her friends and boyfriend in one day. Done being the girl who couldn’t stop crying over a guy. Done being the laughing stock of her old friends. She would show all of them how good she could be without all of them.
She would show them.
x X x X x
Spike was happy to see that when he got up that morning, Dru was packed up and gone, no sign of her coming back. It was like a weight off of his shoulders that sh e was gone. Now all he wanted to concentrate on was getting back with Buffy.
He was nervous, like a school boy before a first date. He didn’t really know why, though. She’d said she would talk to him when Dru was gone. Well, she was gone. So she would have to talk to him.
x X x X x
Buffy decided as she walked into school that day that she would avoide talking to Spike completely. The best and easiest way to get over him would to simply stop contact with him. It would be better… for both of them. And so she felt good walking the halls that day. Judging by the reactions of most guys as she walked through the halls, she figured her choice of outfitting was nice. Even the girls smiled at her as she passed them by.
Maybe there was hope for her yet. The population of Sunnydale High may very well be on her side in all of this.
“Hey Buffy!” Willow sprang out of nowhere.
“Hey, Wil. Whats up?” she smiled.
“You look different today…” Willow noted. Less preppy-teenage beauty queen, more womanly elegance. “Something good happen?”
Pretty much the opposite actually…
Buffy shrugged and tried to smile a little. It didn’t really work. “I guess you could say that.”
“Oh,” Willow was a little concerned now. “Are you gonna tell me what happened?”
Buffy stopped at her locker and began turning the combination lock, head cocked to one side. “I had a talk with Spike last night…”
Willows mood instantly turned hopeful. “And…?”
Buffy shrugged again. “We’re completely over.”
Willows smile dropped. “What? But… you seem so happy about that…”
“I am,” Buffy said as she grabbed her books out of her locker and shut it. “I’m done moping, Wil. I won’t be everyone’s second choice. I’m moving on.”
The two girls started walking together down the hall. Buffy smiling at all of the guys who smiled at her appraisingly. Willow was surprised, to say the least. Spike had told Xander who told Willow this morning that Drusilla had left. Spike had seemed hopeful and excited to see Buffy, yet here she was, apparently moving on.
She got the feeling that something was missing. Somewhere in there, there must have been a misunderstanding, she just didn’t know who’s side it happened on.
x X x X x
Drusilla walked up to Buffy’s front door and looked around to be sure no one was looking at her.
Holding a stack of photos she smirked devilishly and stuffed them in an envelope with Buffy’s name written clear across the front. After sealing the envelope into the mailbox, and then turned back to the street and got In her waiting cab.
x X x X x
Spike was anxious to get to lunch that day. Buffy had sat with his friends the day before, so she must be sitting there today.
He couldn’t wait to tell her about Dru leaving, that was, if she didn’t know already. Despite everything that had happened between them, he believed this was their chance to patch things up.
He walked through the halls with a bit of a skip in his step.
x X x X x
Buffy walked into the cafeteria and gave a small wave to Willow who was already waiting with Oz at the table.
As she approached the end of the long lunch line she saw Spike come into the cafeteria through the doors on the opposite side of the cafeteria.
As she looked at him she found she was losing her breath. As mad as she was, she couldn’t face him yet.
He started to scan the lunch room as he approached Willow and Oz. Buffy watched as they talked, and the look on Willows face worried her a little. Suddenly she saw Willow look in her direction and point.
It was like slow motion as she watched as Spikes head began to turn in her direction, and rather than wait for him to spot her, she panicked, grabbed a tray to cover her face, and ducked into the middle of the lunch line.
She didn’t know why suddenly she was so afraid to confront him. This morning she felt so good about their relationship –or whatever it was- being over. But now, with him scanning the cafeteria looking for her, she simply didn’t want to be seen.
“Ex boyfriend or loan shark?” the person behind her suddenly asked.
Buffy turned around slowly and when she first laid eyes on him a small flutter went through her abdomen. “Excuse me?”
“The person you’re hiding from?” he asked with a questioning gaze and slight smirk.
“Oh.”
God how I so DON’T want to get into that…
“Both. Ugly breakup.”
Well I’m not lying…
As she looked at this dark haired man standing by her she couldn’t help but smile and blush. He was kinda cute. “I’m sorry, I just cut you-“
“No!” he moved quickly to say. “Stay. Stay,” he said with a small nod. “I’ll watch your back.”
Buffy was surprised. She’d never seen him around school before, then again, there were probably a lot of people here that she’d never really noticed before. She smiled and looked at him a couple times as the lunch line progressed and she grabbed some things off the shelves.
As they reached the end of the line she looked over at Willow who was waving frantically for her to get over there. However, she simply put one finger up to indicate she’d be there in a moment and turned back toward the guy who had so generously let her cut him.
“So…” he said smiling down at her.
“So,” she turned a little. “Those are my…” she said motioning toward Willow, Xander, and Oz. “Are you…”
“Oh, no, I have someone waiting,” he said a little reluctantly. “Otherwise, I’d…” he hesitated and laughed a little. All the while Buffy couldn’t stop smiling at him. “Uh,” he said blinking a few times as he extended his hand out to her. “Parker… Abrams.”
She gladly took his hand and smiled a little shyly. “Buffy Summers.”
“Okay, well, I’ll see you around, Buffy Summers.”
She smiled and twirled ever so slightly, excited from their interaction. “See ya, Parker Abrams,” and with that he smiled curtly at her and they both walked to their respective tables.
Then it dawned on her, ever since she had started talking to Parker she never once thought about Spike who, unbeknownst to her, was standing in a corner behind her, seething with anger and jealousy as he watched Parker retreat to his lunch table.
Buffy set her tray down at the table and couldn’t help but smile as she took her seat, grateful that Spike apparently chose not to sit with them once again today.
As much as Willow felt uneasy about what was going on between Buffy and Spike, she couldn’t help but feel happy for Buffy. She was smiling… really smiling for the first time since the whole blowout. “So… spill. What was that all about with the cutie patootie?”
Buffy’s smile widened at the thought of him, and she looked over in his direction. “I don’t know. Nothing serious I think. Just random adorableness.”
“Oh a technique I know well,” Xander added. “Hit the girl with your best shot… and then hasta,” he said with a hand gesture that said get outta there.
Oz smiled as much as he could, being Oz. “Gotta respect the drive-by.”
Xander continued. “Low rejection… Fond memories,” he smiled and nodded.
Everyone in their little group seemed to side mostly with Buffy. True, she lied to Spike, but they could all tell that she was really going to end it with Riley and be with him. It was a shame Spike reacted the way he did, and letting Drusilla stay with him wasn’t helping the situation one bit. So, there mission was to make Buffy feel better, any way they could.
Willow shrugged a little and smiled. “It looked like more than that to me. He got all googly-eyed.”
Xander looked at Buffy and winked. “And that’s because he got hit by the Buffinator. Now he’s powerless.”
Buffy couldn’t help the excited smile that spread out across her face as she wriggled in her seat a bit. “You think?”
Oz nodded. “No question. He’ll be back.”
They all felt a little guilty, being Spikes friends and all, but he didn’t need to know what they were saying. At this point, they just wanted to see her smile again, and if this is what did it, then so be it.
Buffy knew they were just trying to make her feel better, but the more they egged her on the more excited she felt about this Parker guy.
She definitely felt spark-age, mostly of the tingly kind. There could definitely be some feelings there, and it excited her.
Spike stormed out of the cafeteria, shoving some younger kids out of the way in the process.
He needed to get away before he put his fist through something. Seeing Buffy… it turned out exactly the opposite of what he had been hoping for. He was sure he’d be able to march up to her and tell her that Dru was gone, and they’d talk and get back together. Instead he’s come to the cafeteria, looked around for her and when he found her she had been blushing and laughing it up with some lunk head.
Maybe nothing would come of it, maybe he was overreacting, but he had a bad feeling about that Parker guy.
He stormed through the double doors to the parking lot as he whipped his keys out of his pocket and walked up to his car.
“Mr. Giles…” an irritatingly familiar voice rang through his ears.
“Bloody hell,” he mumbled as he turned around, looking defeated.
“Where exactly do you think you’re going? You know you’re not allowed to leave campus until school has let out.”
“I was, um,” he hesitated for a moment, trying to figure out a good excuse. He had nothin’. “I wasn’t leavin’, just grabbin’ my jacket is all.”
The short balding man approached him slowly, never taking his eyes off of him. “You’ve got a real attitude problem, Mr. Giles. Ever since the first day I met you.”
Spike huffed.
This bloody hell wasn’t the way I wanted to spend my afternoon…
“Mr. Giles I suggest you get back into the building and get ready for your next class,” he said looking him up and down. “I’ll be watching you. Have a good day.”
Spike rolled his eyes and trudged back toward the school building. “Not bloody likely,” he mumbled under his breath.
“What was that?” Snyder snapped as he turned his attention on Spike again.
“Nothing, sir. Just having a bad day is all.”
“Well keep your issues at home. There are more important things to worry about.”
x X x X x
Buffy walked home from school that day. Spike had seemingly disappeared for the rest of the day and even if he hadn’t, she probably wouldn’t have been able to ask for a ride anyway. It would have been too awkward.
Maybe it was better that way. Her relationship with Spike had been so spur of the moment, so passionate and intense… maybe it wasn’t safe for them to be friends. Nothing good could come of it.
After what she saw last night… mere hours after their phone conversation, it was a splash of cold water. Had she not seen Dru go into his room last night, she may very well have let him back into her good graces. And right now, with everything she knew, she wasn’t ready to her him be on her good side.
At the edge of the sidewalk Buffy stopped to gather some things out of the mailbox, stealing quick glances over at Spikes house across the street. His car wasn’t there.
Even with all the disgust over Drusilla, she still couldn’t help the twinge of sadness that stuck at the thought of him not being there, and she hated herself for it.
As she looked blankly through the pile of junk mail and bills in her hand as she walked through the front door, one envelope caught her eye. Not only because it was the only piece of mail that came for her rather than her mother, but because there was no return address or stamp. It had to have been delivered personally by whomever the sender was. It was strange.
Just as she was about to open it the phone began to ring. Buffy looked up at the clock. Judging by the time it was, Buffy assumed it was probably her mom, inquiring about what to do for dinner.
Buffy quickly set the pile of mail down on the table and ran to make it to the phone before it stopped ringing.
x X x X x
A few hours had passed and Buffy had completely forgotten about the mystery envelope in the mail, that was until Joyce brought it upstairs to Buffy and began inquiring about it.
She sat up in bed and took the envelope from her mother, then stuck a finger into the corner, tearing it open and smirking at her mother who was waiting patiently in the doorway, no doubt curious about the envelopes contents.
As Buffy pulled out the contents of the envelope she suddenly realized who the sender was. Her face paled and she had to swallow hard to keep from crying.
“What is it, honey?” Joyce asked.
Buffy looked up and managed a completely forced fake smile, not wanting her mother to know what the contents truly were, so she lied.
“Just some… old pictures from the year book staff at school. Probably finished with them already.”
Joyce knew her daughter well enough to know her daughter was faking the smile. Based on what Buffy had told her, though, she just assumed the ‘old’ pictures were of her and Riley or her and Cordelia, and that was why she was faking a smile.
Joyce gave Buffy a warm smile from her spot in the doorway. “People grow apart, Buffy. All you can do is look back and remember all the fond memories you had with them. Don’t dwell on what could have been,” she said. And with that she left the room, shutting the door behind her.
As soon as the door closed Buffy had to close her eyes and steady herself. She promised herself she wouldn’t cry anymore, and so she refused to. She reopened her eyes and shuffled quickly through the stack of photos which had come out of the envelope. At the end she couldn’t help the sound of disgust she let out and threw them on the floor next to the garbage can.
Too angry to do anything else at this point she rolled over, flipped off the light and curled up in bed, welcoming the dreamland that would take her away from this one.
On the floor lay various pictures of Spike and Drusilla laughing, kissing, and what she was sure was a private collection of snapshots taken during some pretty heated sex.
Buffy pursed her lips. This was the last straw.
TBC