Author's Chapter Notes:
*hanging head in shame* Sorry it took so long to update. I know I left the story on a cliff-hangy, highly emotional, intense note. Truly, it wasn't my intention to take so long. Well, even with the delay, I hope you will fully enjoy! *Please* Before you go, let me give a HUGE thanks to my beta and beautiful friend, Sanityfair. Love ya lady!!!!
“Why is the path unclear,
When we know home is near…
Tell me where do we go from here.”


Excerpt from the song Where do we go from here?
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode: Once More with Feeling





Can we rest now, Buffy? Can we rest? Will’s haunting words continually tumbled through her mind like shells caught on the ocean’s waves.

The pair eventually made it back to the couch. Will’s head rested on Buffy’s lap, her fingers idly toying with his loosened curls. While he slept, his arms encircled her—one arm wrapped around her waist and the other was curled under her thighs, just above her knees.

Them being like this—this closeness, flooded her with nostalgia. Buffy’s gaze focused on Will’s relaxed features, almost studying him.

He looked so peaceful. Almost angelic, were it not for his harshly bleached hair and the trisecting scar marring his brow, both tarnishing his faux innocence.

She’d witnessed how people had judged him on looks alone. Hell, even she had been guilty of this. Fortunately, she was given the opportunity to see past the tough exterior and reaped the benefits of fully experiencing the inner beauty not many were privy to.

Tonight, she finally saw this side of him again. However, such as other things in life, this cut both ways. Along with the sheer elation she felt, the earlier unrelenting confusion returned with a vengeance, and it brought along a new plaguing question: Where do we go from here?

Will awoke to the pleasurable feel of Buffy’s fingers gently sweeping through his hair. Fearing she would stop if she knew he was awake, he kept his eyes firmly closed and tried to keep his breathing at a slow, even rhythm. All the while, he relished in her tender loving care.

He truly missed this—the connection and intimacy once shared between them. He even savored this small gesture. Now, lying in her arms, he felt so complete. Unfortunately, on the outskirts of his happiness, there were two lingering questions troubling him.

Where do we go from here? And more importantly, was there a here in their relationship to move on from?

“So how long has it been since you’ve slept, Will?”

Buffy’s voice startled him slightly, yet he wasn’t surprised she knew he was awake. She was always so perceptive. Deciding quickly between playing possum and admitting the jig was up, Will inhaled deeply and lifted up slightly to glance over at the mantle clock.

He noticed it had been over twenty-four hours since the Sandman had visited him. Not wanting to worry her, he chose to keep his answer as vague as possible.

“Let’s just say it’s been awhile.” Will stretched his once idle muscles without relinquishing his hold.

“Well, I knew that. What with the raccoon eyes that you’d thought I didn’t notice, and especially with all the drool you left on my lap—“

Despite not wanting to move, he needed to prove her wrong. He released his hold and sat up to get a better look at the area in question.

“Oi! That’s not drool! That’s a wet spot from the snow!”

“Mmhm…yeah, whatever gets you through the embarrassment.”

“Oh yeah! ‘ll show you embarrassment, when I make you wet your knickers!”

Quickly, Will’s hands lunged forward with his wiggling fingers attacking her sides. To no avail, Buffy squirmed and wriggled as though trying to evade him, all the while screeching and laughing.

“Will…no…stop…please…stop!”

Buffy rose up, trying to use the arm of the couch to aid in her getaway. Despite her attempt to flee, Will was relentless. She twisted and shifted, but his hands were everywhere at once.

Even though she had tears streaming from her eyes and was laughing uncontrollably, Buffy seemed to have gotten the upper hand and caught him completely off-guard.

She wrapped her hands tightly around his wrists and tugged. When he landed face first onto the cushions, she quickly straddled his back. She launched an unmerciful attack on his most ticklish spots, paying him back for his deviousness.

Will bucked, like an unbroken bronco under her as she held him. Even with his muffled peels of laughter and current position, he skillfully rolled his body, bringing Buffy astride his lap.

Initially, she continued torturing him. That was until his hips rose in an attempt to dislodge her, and he knew she felt the clear evidence of his excitement.

Buffy’s hands stilled instantly, causing Will to stop wriggling like worm on a hook and his gaze to focus on her. He noticed her wide eyes and teeth worrying her bottom lip. She appeared nervous.

Apparently, neither of them knew what to say as they stared at one another, anxiously waiting for the other to break the silence. Buffy’s movements were awkward as she slid from his lap, moved further down the couch, and sat.

Will closed his eyes tightly in order to gain his composure. He needed a moment to sort through everything. Will was frustrated. His cock and libido were suffering from the unfairness of the situation, and the small part of his mind that still worked, hoped he hadn’t bollocksed things up.

Finally, a calmed Will sat up and noticed Buffy gazing around the room as she toyed with the hem of her sweater.

“Buffy, it wasn’t my intention to make you feel uncomfortable. ‘M sorry.”

With Will’s apology, Buffy turned and met his gaze. He noticed a blush dusting her cheeks and her glistening bottom lip was faintly indented from non-stop biting.

“No, don’t apologize. You didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. It’s just…well, I’m more confused than anything.”

Her response was totally unexpected. He’d braced himself for her calling him out on his perversity and storming upstairs. But this…he didn’t really know what to think.

“Care to elaborate, pet, ‘m kinda confused myself.”

“Well, I didn’t expect you to react like…um…that. Not after almost two years of you barely touching me, never mind…”

Now, it was Will’s turn for his eyes to widen. They first grew in total confusion and disbelief, but they remained so due to the utter absurdity of her words.

Will noticed Buffy reacting from the look of “What the hell?” plastered on his face. After all their time together, he could easily read her. She was either considering telling him off or running away. Either way, she was pissed.

Needing to stop her from doing either, Will gently placed his hand on her arm in hopes to ease her churning mind. He knew he needed to clear up this misunderstanding before things went from bad to worse.

“No, please don’t go.”

Buffy jerked away from his touch and with a loud huff, crossed her arms. Her brassed off-glare clearly telling him to speak and to do it quickly.

“You’re completely daft you know that?”

His blunt statement triggered a gasp of what he could only guess was indignation. Fearing now she would surely bolt, he swiftly added, “This…” motioning to the straining area in his jeans “is only a small part of how wrong you are. Well, definitely not small. Let’s just say a lesser part.”

Will’s quick wit appeared to have breeched Buffy’s annoyed exterior, earning him a tiny smile. Boldly, he slid closer. With their knees now touching, he tenderly took her hands in his as his tone became serious.

“Buffy, during these past two years, I can’t begin to tell you how much ’ve missed you.”

“Then why did you shut me out?”

“I was a bloody fool. I thought if I kept you at bay, I would keep you safe. My ambitions and ego had already wreaked havoc in our lives, and I couldn’t let that happen again. I thought if I changed by keeping a level head, not following my heart and emotions I wouldn’t hurt you anymore.”

Will lowered his gaze from hers, afraid of seeing the hurt his admission would place there. He felt her hands stiffen slightly in his as the silence between them felt louder and harsher than any explosion. The air around them remained heavy with tension until he heard Buffy’s response.

“What complete and utter bullshit!”

Will’s eyes snapped up, as she snatched her hands from his, stood, and began pacing while he remained seated.

“Buffy, don’t ya think I know this! Hindsight is twenty-twenty, yeah?”

Will watched her pacing in front of the fireplace, her steps steadily completing the distance in three strides.

“So let me get this straight, all this time I thought my husband didn’t want to sleep with me ‘cause he hated me and found me repulsive—“

Will stepped in her path, and gripped her upper arms tightly. His actions cut her off mid-rant, and forced her to stop, look up, and meet his intense gaze.

“Never! Buffy, ‘ve never stopped wantin’ you. Every day. Hell, every moment of every day, ’ve craved you—all of you. ‘Ve desired you. From the roots of your golden locks to the tips of your bubblegum-pink painted toes and everything in between. Still desire—“

Without warning, Will's lips seized hers. For a moment she appeared stunned, but soon she responded. Initially, he felt they resembled a pair of inexperienced teenagers, teeth clashing and noses bumping, but soon they found their rhythm.

Will’s hands tunneled through her flowing hair, holding her firmly, yet tenderly as their mouths dueled and feasted.

Needing more, his lips broke from hers. He could feel Buffy clutching his shoulders while he nipped and suckled the offered, smooth expanse of her throat.

“Buffy…luv…missed you…missed you so much…” Will moaned into her sensitive flesh.

“Will…Will…”

“Mmm…yeah, baby, Will’s got you.”

“Will, wait…”

All of a sudden Buffy pulled from his grasp. During the moments it took his mind to catch up, Will’s eyes remained closed with his puckered lips meeting only air. When they finally opened, he noticed Buffy now standing near the fireplace with the couch between them.

“What—“

“Will, we just can’t go back to who we were and what we had before. Too much has happened, and—“

Her words felt like a solid force crashing into him, leaving him off-balance. He should’ve known. He should’ve known her taking him back after everything was just a fantasy. Now, that reality slapped him in the face, he needed to pick up the tattered remains of his life and go—now.

“I understand, Buffy, I—look, ‘m really tired. ‘M gonna head upstairs for some kip. When I get up, I’ll make you somethin’ better to eat than greasy buffalo wings. Sound good?”

Without waiting for her response, he headed upstairs. Buffy watched as he went, her mind churning a mile a minute.

What the hell?

She had no clue what just happened. One minute they were kissing. Really amazingly kissing. Then everything just clicked, and at long last it made perfect sense. She stopped to tell him about her epiphany, but he interrupted her, said he was tired, and left.

That wasn’t supposed to happen!

Knowing she needed to stop him before he locked himself away again, both literally and figuratively, Buffy rushed up the stairs and grabbed him by the shoulder as he was entering his bedroom. Will stopped and turned to face her.

“Buffy, ‘m tired and—“

“You called me daft! Well, you’re dafter than Daffy Duck!”

Will’s scarred brow arched at this strange and confusing statement.

“Huh? That doesn’t even make a lick of sense, and what the ‘ell are you goin’ on about—“

“For once me and words are with the oneness, and you don’t even let me get them out! I tried to talk and bam! You just cut me off, claiming you’re tired then you left! Well, you’re just gonna have to stand there till I get it all out!” Will seemed to know it was futile to argue and nodded his head silently urging her to continue.

Now, having his undivided attention, Buffy felt slightly on edge. To calm herself, she exhaled loudly, prepping herself.

“I meant what I said, we can’t go back.”

“I understand—“

“No—no you don’t. Like I said, we just can’t go back to who we were and what we had before, but…but that doesn’t mean we can’t build something… new.” Buffy extended her hand. Unexpectedly, she felt her cheeks flushing, and she suddenly felt the tiniest bit shy. “So…um…hi— I’m Buffy Pratt and you are?”

Will stood rooted in place, his eyes flickering between her face and extended hand. When it seemed her words finally sank in, Will gave her a beatific smile before he reached forward and wrapped his arms around her waist. With a slight tug, he brought their bodies together, flush from chests to hips.

“Madly in love with you.”

Neither knew nor cared who initiated the kiss. All that mattered now was they were together.






Chapter End Notes:
Am I forgiven? Hopefully. Also, since you've all been so wonderful sticking with me all this time, the next chapter, unless there are any major complications, will be coming next Sunday. Oh, please let me know what you thought of this chapter. This completely makes my day, week, hell...my month!!!!!!



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