Author's Chapter Notes:
In case you don't remember this episode, this is where Spike left and Clem took care of his pad. Buffy need to leave Dawn to Spike but found out that Spike left already. She has mixed emotion when she found out.
BUFFY: (with Dawn beside her) Spike.

Clem: Hi Buffy! Hi (looking at Dawn)

Dawn: Hi

Spike:(stood up) What do you want?

Buffy: Uhmmm... (feeling awkward after the rape) I'm here to leave Dawn in your care... for a while and...

Spike: (cuts Buffy) I don't baby sit anymore. sorry

Clem: (feeling the tension between Spike and Buffy...)Hey Dawn you wanna play Super Mario?

Dawn: ummm... (hesitating)

Clem: (grabs Dawn outside)

Buffy: Look Spike... I know what happened last night...is both painful for the both of us but... I need someone to take care of Dawn while I'm solving Willow's problem.

Spike: (seems like he's packing things up in a box)

Buffy: What are you doing?

Spike: What do you think I'm doing?

Buffy: Are you going somewhere?

Spike: You got it.

Buffy: Maybe you can take Dawn with you.

Spike: No... cause when i step out that door, I'm not coming back.

Buffy: What? Why? What do you mean?

Spike: Isn't this what you want? You don't wanna see me anymore, you don't like me, you can't shag me, and worst of all (murmurs) you can NEVER love me. So what's the point staying here?

Buffy: Look Spike...we need you.

Spike: you don't need me. you just pump out information from me and that's it. you gonna throw me again outside your world after that. Well, of course, I made something that can be my alternative, pet, this book. I wrote this book about demons and other entities related to them and the vampires. So you don't need to look for me for information about them. So bye slayer.(puts the book at the top of the tv, in that book, there is the answer how to stop the wrath of Willow)

Buffy: William, (near to tears) I'm... sorry (in a soft voice)

Spike: keep your sorries... oh, anyway, you can ask Clem to take care of Dawn. He'll stay here.

Buffy: Where will you go?

Spike: Somewhere I can find peace. (heading towards the door)

Buffy: Spike...

Spike: (facing the door)don't worry, I forgive you. what can i do then, I can't force the slayer to love me.

Buffy: Spike will you let me speak!

Spike: OK, any last words?...

Buffy: I know I was being such a bitch to you...maybe it's me. I'm the problem...

Spike: no

Buffy: yes Spike it's me... I feel disgusted, confused when you cross my mind that's why I'm taking my frustrations on you. because i just can't believe that someone like you will do this to me

Spike: someone like what? a monster?! a vampire that has no soul?! I heard it all slayer! I'm sorry that I can never be like Angel!!!

(to be continued)


Chapter End Notes:
to be continued...



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