And now? Could she see a future for them? Buffy squeezed his hand and met his eyes. So blue. A stormy ocean. His jaw tightened. He was scared to hear her response. She could relate...she was scared to say it. “I want to fight for us, even if the thing I have to fight is you.”
“Yeah?”
She nodded and grinned as he pulled her onto his lap. “Yeah.” She turned to face him, one knee on either side of his thighs and brought her hands to the sides of his face. “But you have to fight too. You have to fight whatever it is that makes you think you’re not enough. You’re...you’re what I want, Spike. So get your shit together.”
“My shit? You swear now?”
He was teasing, but she could see the wetness in his eyes he was struggling to hold back. She smiled. “It’s been a dark few months. I’m at least thirty percent less peppy.”
He frowned and rubbed her cheek with the pad of his thumb. “Sorry isn’t enough, but I don’t know what else to say, love.”
“I know. I wasn’t trying to beat you up. I think we’ve both had enough of that. If we’re going to have a fresh start, as equals, then I can’t hold a grudge. I can’t keep pointing out that you were an idiot.”
“That gonna be hard for you, kitten?”
“Probably.”
His fingers slipped up her neck and into her hair and rubbed the base of her skull. “Anything I can do to make it easier?”
“Doubtful.” She leaned in to kiss him but stopped halfway there. “Oh! No more lizard brain, caveman nonsense just because I talk to someone with a Y chromosome. You have to trust me.”
“Yes, ma'am.”
“I’m not kidding.”
“I know, love, and I do trust you. I’ll be good--promise. I’m not gonna screw this up again.”
“Good.” She pressed her lips to his for a light kiss. “Because good boys get treats.”
He tugged her closer. “Treats you say. Care to be more specific?”
And just like that, warmth filled her stomach. What he’d said wasn’t even actually dirty, but something in his tone had her heart racing. Would it ever stop amazing her? With just a glance, he could make her tremble. She shook her head slowly from side to side. “Nope.” She popped the ‘p’. “ You’ll just have to be good to find out.”
He groaned. “Give me a hint. We talkin’ cookies?”
Buffy giggled and pinched his side. “I should be. You’re looking kind of skinny.”
“Oi!”
She laughed a bit more before leaning in to whisper near his ear. “Can we be done with the talking now?”
“Got other plans for my tongue, kitten?”
“Just make love to me, William.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed. “That I can do. But no rushing things like last time. This time, we do things my way.” He slid his hands under her ass and lifted her as he stood up.
Buffy squeaked, wrapped her legs around his waist and looped her arms over his head. “Your way?”
“Mmm Hmm.” He placed her on the bed and toed off his shoes. “My way. Nice and slow-like.” He started back toward the bed.
Buffy held up her hand, palm out, like she was about to sing a classic Supremes song. “Take your shirt off.”
Spike shook his head but complied. “Bossy girl.”
“Not bossy. Leadership skills.” He did look thinner, but his bare stomach and chest still made her mouth go dry. She bit her lip. Oh yeah, definitely lickable. As she clutched a bedsheet and watched him crawl up the bed, a sound an awful lot like a whimper slipped over her lips.
He settled one knee between hers and held himself up on his elbows.
Buffy let her head fall back on the pillow.“You’re gorgeous.”
He pressed his forehead against hers. “You’re mine.” His mouth covered hers for a fierce kiss and he groaned as his tongue slipped over her lips.
The deep rumble sent a wave of desire to her core. God, he made her so needy. She ran her hands down his back, hooked her thumbs into the waistband of his jeans and tugged him closer. “I need you inside me.”
The blacks of his eyes grew big and he gave her a single nod before he kissed her again, hard. Spike brushed his lips over her cheek and rubbed his nose against her temple. “Have to get reacquainted first. Plan to kiss my way up and down your sexy little body a good few times.” His teeth tugged on her earlobe. “I want you lay back and let me take care of you.”
She was going to argue, but something in his eyes made it clear he needed this. Buffy sighed and lifted her arms up to tuck her hands beneath her head on the pillow. “Fine. Do your painfully slow ravishing thing.”
He grinned. “Worshipping more like.”
His thumbs brushed the sensitive skin on her abdomen as he pulled her shirt up. She gasped as they moved over her breasts, sending little shivers of pleasure to her core.
“Knew you weren’t wearing a bra.”
“I wasn’t really planning on leaving the house.”
“I’m glad you did.”
She sat up just enough so that he could tug her shirt over her head. “Me too.”
God! Even his gaze felt hot as it slid across her breasts. She fought off her need to grab him and take over. She’d never have expected the man on the motorcycle that night harbored such a gentle side, that he craved moments like this. She’d been silly. This was what he’d never had before. For all of Spike’s experience, he’d been just as new to real intimacy as she’d been. Buffy felt that intimacy, that trust, and connection, no matter the pace of their lovemaking. It had only slowly occurred to her that it was different for him. Oh certainly everything they shared was grounded in love, but he felt it more, or maybe just thought he was giving it more, during the foreplay than he did the finale.
With the pad on his thumb, Spike traced the edge of her cheekbone and down her jaw, then brushed her hair away from her neck. “Love your hair...and your neck and your shoulder. Sexy little shoulder.” He rubbed his lips along her collarbone. “And here.”
Of course, he skipped over her breasts entirely and kissed her hip instead. She groaned in frustration. “You definitely missed a spot.”
Smirking, Spike pulled her shorts down her legs, tossed them on the floor, and kissed the inside of her knee. “I have a question, love.”
She pushed her elbows into the mattress and lifted her shoulders so she could see him.
He stroked her thigh and ran his fingertip along the edge of her underwear. He was biting his lip and not meeting her eyes.
She took a guess. “There wasn’t anyone while we were--there’s never been anyone else.”
He looked up with wide eyes and he swallowed before pressing his lips to her stomach. He turned and rested his cheek on the same spot. “That’s not--I wouldn’t have asked you ‘bout that. Ever. I know it’s not my place.”
“Then I won’t ask you.”
He chuckled. “I haven’t even thought about another girl since the day you marched into the garage with those damn cookies. There was no one else.”
She let out the breath she didn’t even realize she’d been holding in. “I’m glad.”
“Me too, kitten.”
“So what was the question?”
He lifted his head and met her gaze straight on. “Earlier you said--you said wouldn’t have married me.”
“I said I wouldn’t have married you yet. I’ll marry you someday.”
“That so?”
“Yup. Assuming you don’t dump me for my own good and you get the jealousy thing under control.”
He hooked his thumbs under the side of her underwear and coaxed them off her hips and down her thighs. “You wearing my ring might help with the jealous thing.”
She laughed softly. “Engagement rings are weird.”
His right eyebrow shot up.
“I mean they’re a little like a tag a guy puts on you to claim you as his and let other guys know that you’re taken. Guys don’t wear anything to show that they're engaged.” She shrugged. “On the other hand...sparkly.”
“You do like sparkly.”
“I do.”
“What if I’m tagged too. Could get a tattoo.”
She giggled. “Property of Buffy Summers?”
“If you insist.”
Buffy pretended to give the idea serious consideration, though she was rather fond of his skin as it was. “Hmm...where would we put it?”
He reached up, took her hand and brought it to his chest. He placed her palm against him and covered her hand with his own. “I’d put your name here.”
“Over your heart.”
He nodded.
Her breath caught in her throat. She bit her lip and blinked hard. “That’s…”
“Everyone who sees it will know that every time my heart beats it’s for you.”
Buffy pulled his mouth to hers and poured herself into a kiss. Every feeling, every moment she’d missed him, she gave it all to the kiss. The last bit of reserve, the wall she couldn’t help but try to keep up to avoid being hurt again, fell away. She had no choice. With him, she’d always be all in. “I love you, William.”
Later, much later, Buffy rolled onto her side and put her hand on his chest. “I don’t actually want you to get a tattoo. I like your chest just as it is and I don’t need to permanently mark your body to know that you’re mine...although it was a very romantic thought.”
She rested her head on his shoulder and he stroked her hair. “Should I return the ring then?”
Buffy laughed. “No. I like sparkly things.”
“So you’ll wear it?”
“I will. Later. Once you’ve actually proposed.”
He chuckled. The deep sound vibrated through his chest and tickled her cheek.
“Don’t do it when we’re fighting or when we’re naked.”
“I’ll keep that in mind. Any other conditions?”
“No.” She lifted her head to see him. “I mean don’t over do it either. It doesn’t have to be perfect.”
“You’d prefer an imperfect proposal. Got it.”
She smacked his shoulder. “Wise ass.”
“You love that about me”
“Maybe.”
He flipped them both and pinned her to the bed. “Just maybe?” He gave her a faux-menacing glare. “Might need to tickle the truth out of you.”
“Don’t you dare!”
He grinned mischievously and reached for her ankle.
“I mean it, Spike. One finger touches the bottom of my foot and I’ll--”
“Sorry kitten, you’ve always known that I’m a bad--”
Buffy wriggled free and dashed out of the room.
Laughing, Spike chased her into the kitchen. He held his hands up, palms out in surrender. “Okay kitten, you win.”
She grabbed a spatula from his dish drainer. “Stay back, mister. I can use this for more than baking cookies.”
He faked right then darted around the kitchen island and caught her wrist. “ Uh uh uh. This flapjack’s not ready to be flipped.”
Buffy dissolved into giggles. “What does that even mean?”
“Haven’t the faintest, love. Sometimes my mouth opens and words just spill out. When you’re around, my blood doesn’t exactly rush in the direction of my brain”
She sighed, but with amusement more than anything else. “Any chance I’ll find anything edible in that fridge of yours.”
“Absolutely none. Let’s order something we can eat in bed.” He took the spatula from her hand and laid it on the counter.
“Fine, but tomorrow we’re getting groceries.”
He shook his head as though he was very disappointed, but she could see the glint of amusement in his eyes. “Always trying to fatten me up.”
“I can’t help it. It’s how Summers women show love. It’s like genetic.”
“Guess it’s a good thing I’ve got you to help me burn off all the calories.”
Buffy grinned. “If we order a pizza right now we’ll probably have like forty-five minutes to...burn calories before the delivery guy gets here.”
“Anyone ever mentioned that you’re brilliant, kitten?”
She looped her arms around his neck. “You have. I mean not lately...but--”
He kissed her. “How ‘bout I promise to tell you every day for the next...oh, say... the rest of our lives? How’s that sound, love?”
“I could probably handle that.” Buffy returned his kiss and giggled as he scooped her up and started back toward the bedroom. She had a feeling it would be awhile before they ordered that pizza.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Here it is: The end. (Finally!) I hope it leaves people satisfied. I've enjoyed writing this story and I appreciate you reading it.
Chapter End Notes:
Thank you for reading.