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Author's Chapter Notes:
There's a sex scene at the very end of the chapter. You have been warned.
Past-Spike stared at Past-Buffy in bewilderment, but the pain shook him the bone and he was forced to double over. "No," he gritted out. "No."

Past-Buffy folded her legs under her and rested Past-Spike's head on her lap. "You have to. I'm pretty sure disobeying hurts you. How long do you think you can take this? But, if you hurt me, then your pain stops. Simple"

He shook his head slowly. "I won't. You can't make me." His voice broke and cracked with pain and tears.

Past-Buffy ran her fingers through his soft curls "Spike, please."

Past-Spike lifted himself to a kneeling position, bracing himself against Past-Buffy's shoulders. His lips quivered and he sucked in a shaky breath. He struggled to quirk the corners of his mouth, but the task was too great for his condition. "There's no bloody way I'm hurting you." Each word was a struggle, a chore he finished through pure defiance.

Past-Buffy cupped his face and dragged her lips softly over his. "Yes, you are."

Past-Spike trembled uncontrollably in her hands, and moaned as another shot of venomous agony shot through him. "N-o," he moaned again.

Past-Buffy squeezed her eyes shut and bit her lip as she searched for a plan. Inspiration struck and releasing her lip she bit her tongue until her teeth met. It hurt, but the fear of losing her vampire was greater than the pain.

Past-Spike stiffened when he smelled the blood. He looked at her. "What-?"

Past-Buffy brought his face to hers and once again kissed him. This time she forced his mouth open and slid her tongue passed his lips.

His reaction was immediate. His face shifted as his demon surfaced. He pulled her against his chest as he suck the blood, pulling more to the surface. His fingers dug into her hips and his fangs cut her lips ruthlessly. His pain ebbed and he moaned, this time in pleasure.

Past-Buffy was stuck between pleasure and pain as she and Past-Spike's vicious kiss continued. 'Plan worked,' she thought. 'That is a good thing, right?' The pleasure washed away, and she struggled to keep from pushing him for her.

Past-Spike's mind cleared as the pained dissolved. He jerked away from her, once more wearing his human mask. "I—" Tears glossed his eyes. "I gotta go. I'm… sorry." He scrambled to his feet and took off through the cemetery. The Slayer's blood he had drank, though only a small amount, had healed most of his minor wounds, and helped greatly with the major ones.

"Spike!" Past-Buffy called after him.

He collapsed in front of his crypt, breathing heavily. He dropped his forehead against the door and tried to close himself off to the immense shame he felt.

The door to his crypt opened and he looked up to see Angelus.

"Well done boy. I knew you had it in you. It's what you are. What we are," Angelus gloated.

"No, I'm not… I have a soul."

"So did Manson." He crouched down to look evenly into Past-Spike's eyes. "We're meant to be sadistic, evil… pure in our way. We're not heroes. Soul or no."

Past-Spike searched Angelus' eyes. "I'm a monster," he said.

"It's intoxicating, isn't it? We know what we were meant to be, what you are. We're the thing nightmares are made of. Sex, blood and rock 'n roll." Angelus chuckled at his joke.

Past-Spike nodded. "Yeah."

"William, are you ready to come back to the fold?"

Past-Spike stared into Angelus' eyes, his own deadened to all emotion. "Yes, Sire."

Angelus wrapped an arm around Past-Spike and pulled him to his chest. "Welcome back, Childe."

XxXxXx

Buffy lay silently in Spike's arms as they once more shared the cot in the basement.

Spike kissed her neck as he rubbed her arm soothingly. "What's wrong, baby?" he whispered against her skin.

"The last time we were down here, it was the last time we really talked; the last time we made-love."

Spike turned her so she faced him. "Honestly, it was the first time we made-love. You never loved me any other time, and until my soul I couldn't love, not really.I thought I loved you with every fiber of my being, I was wrong."

She frowned at him. "You don't?"

He brushed his lips against her collarbone. "I didn't, not until the soul. I hurt you, Buffy. I thought I was incapable of that." He looked down. "I don't know how you can love me after what I tried to do. What I would have done."

Buffy slid her fingers under his chin and lifted his face to hers again. "No, you wouldn't have. You stopped."

"Because you made me. How can you even look at me, Buffy?"
Buffy ran he thumb across his cheekbone, and he closed his eyes momentarily. "I love you, Spike."

"How could you?"

"I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me you bring out," Buffy repeated her favorite poem.

Spike stared at her, surprised she knew one of his favorites. "You read Roy Croft?" he asked doubtfully.

"After you died, I read a lot of poetry. All the ones you read to me, or quoted at me, or simply read to yourself. I did anything that made me feel closer to you."

Spike smiled, his eyes glittered. "Tell me you love me."

"I love you."

His faced turned lustful. "Tell me you want me."

His dialoged struck a memory in her, and she knew he was quoting her. She answered with the next line, "I always want you. Point in fact—"

"Shut up." Spike kissed her.

Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike's shoulders, devouring his mouth. All too soon he moved to her neck, allowing her to breathe. "God, Spike, I love you."

Spike's gripped her tighter. "Say it again."

Buffy ran her fingers through his curls; she grabbed a hand full and tugged it lightly. "I love you. Now it's your turn."

"Buffy I—" Buffy interrupted him.

"No, Spike, show me. Make-love to me, Spike."

Spike buried him face in her soft, golden hair. "I love you so much, Buffy Summers."

Buffy moved her mouth to the vulnerable flesh of his neck, sucking and nipping it.

Spike groaned and moved his body over hers. "Say it, once more."

"I love you," She ran her hands down the smooth skin of his chest and stomach. Her hand stopped at the top of his jeans and she looked into his eyes. "William Pratt. I love you for now… and always."

Spike dipped his head down and kissed her softly, unbuttoning her blouse.

Buffy moaned, her fingers playing against his belt, working to get it undone.

Spike pulled back and quickly rid himself of the jeans. Naked, he slowly strips Buffy of her clothing.

"Spike," she breathes. "Please, Spike. It's been too long."

Spike kissed her softly. "Exactly why this should be slow."

He moved his mouth down her neck. He sucked on her pulse before moving down to breast.

She arched into his mouth, moaning loudly. "God, Spike you're still amazing."

He grinned, his fingers found their way to her core, playing with her clit. Her mewls of pleasure drove him further. He slid one finger into her, pumping gently. Soon he added a second, getting a raise out of Buffy.

He groan as her inner muscles clamped on his fingers. "Oh, kitten, your so tight." His head rested against hers.

Buffy growled in frustration as she tried to get the friction she craved. "Spike!" she whined.

"Alright, Luv."

Spike hovered over her. "Ready?"

"Oh yes, Spike." Buffy pushed her head up and captured his lips as he pressed into her.

Spike gasped and closed his eyes briefly. 'Heaven' he thought and gained a little speed.

Buffy felt herself go to heights she hadn't been to since her last night with Spike. Waves of pleasure built and crashed over her as Spike expertly played her body. She gripped his arms as the moved in together.

Spike looked into Buffy's eyes as he struggled to keep from cumming.

"Bite me."

Spike blinked. "What? No."

Buffy bit down on Spike's neck until blood swelled. "Spike, your mine, bite me."

Spike's eyes rolled up and he moaned deep in his throat. "Yes, yours." His fangs elongated and his eyes turned gold. He slid his fangs into her neck and drew a mouthful of blood. It was enough to throw them both over the edge of their orgasm. "Mine," Spike growled into her neck.

"Yes, Spike, I'm yours," Buffy gasped. Their pleasure intensified by tenfold as their worlds became one. The mating claim sealed.

They slowly came down from their high and Spike licked Buffy's wound closed. "You know what we just did, don't you?" he whispered.

Buffy held his head against her neck and softly ran her fingers through the hair at his nape. "Yes, Spike." She smiled. "And I'd do it again."

Spike wrapped his arms around her and rolled so she was laying on his chest. "You know it's forever, right?"

Buffy brushed her lips over his jaw. "We're forever, Spike."





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