Disclaimer and Notes: see Prologue
Spike’s brain
 
by Belladonna
 
~Chapter 4~
The trouble for bubbles
 
When Buffy had come home after the darned inventory Anya had forced upon them all, she actually had wanted nothing more than to have a really nice, long and very relaxing hot bath right now. But she had learned quite a while ago that she never got what she wanted anyway so why bother?
 
Yet, she still tried. Maybe if she did that often enough, it would work for her just once.
 
So when she had come home then, her mind already gone for relaxing in the tub, the first thing she noticed was the huge pile of bills right on the kitchen table, mostly the bills for the house and stuff like that which were unpaid yet and for which she had no idea on how to pay anyway. But she still could have that nice relaxing bath after all - since the water bill already was high, it wouldn’t fall that deep into it.
 
But when she had gone upstairs to let herself some water into the bathtub, she noticed that she had run out of her favourite bubble bath, the one that smelled so nicely and made these pretty bubbles. That now meant that the relaxing part of the evening went straight to hell.
 
She would so not have her bath without these bubbles in it!
 
Sighing heavily, she surrendered to her fate and went to leave the house once more. On her way outside, she ran into Dawn.
 
“Where are you going?” The teen asked curiously. “Haven’t you just arrived with the words ‘I’ll never leave the house again!’?”
 
“Well, that was before.”
 
“Before what?” Dawn wondered and then snapped angrily at her older sister. “Before these five minutes you arrived here and had me wondering whether you will actually spend an evening with me so that we could do try that sister-sister bonding thing finally once more? You know, where we sit on the couch, eat some ice cream and watch some movies like we used to? The thing we no longer do now since you seem to have forgotten about me!”
 
“No, Dawnie. I haven’t forgotten about you, but this is much more important.” Buffy answered, looking slightly distressed. If only that teen would have her problems once, she wouldn’t be complaining that much all the time. And this was a true emergency, a real one this time not like that phony inventory thing. “Before I found out that we are out of bubble bath.”
 
“OH NOOOO!” Dawn screamed madly. This was serious! If they had no longer bubble bath in the house, it would lead to catastrophe, worse than being out of coffee, which Dawn of course didn’t drink yet so it wouldn’t be for her. But no bubble bath?! That was horrible, way worse than horrible!
 
“Well, why are you still here? Go and buy some!” Dawn practically shoved her sister out of the house, and Buffy only managed to get the door open in the very last second before she’d have bumped into it.
 
Buffy stepped into the night; or rather stumbled with a good push of her sister as a head start. She was now on a mission, she had to find that bubble bath she loved; otherwise her whole evening would be ruined. Her fatigue forgotten, she made her way towards the first store, sending loads of prayers to the supermarket gods that they would be still open and having her famous bubble bath.
 
***
 
Meanwhile in the crypt, the Three Nerdketeers were facing a completely different problem.
 
“What the soddin’ hell have you done to me?!” Spike screamed at them, that was the one on the television screen. The other still remained silent and absolutely unmoving, sitting in the chair and facing himself on the screen. “And why hasn’t anybody told me that my hair has this funny colour now?!”
 
“This is not good, this is not good.” Andrew repeated over and over again like a mantra. Warren had mentally joined him at some point, but he was sure that his ‘not good’ meant something other than Andrew’s.
 
“Was that supposed to happen?” Jonathan asked curiously and glanced expectantly towards their leader. “This is what should have happened, right?”
 
“What? Ah, yes, yes, everything does work according to plan.” Warren reassured him, willing the sweat from his forehead. This definitely was not good, but it could still become. “It will work fine, don’t think too hard about it.”
 
“Well, I am a good looking bloke after all, these years of un-living have been good to me.” They heard from the background the other Spike ranting, getting a good visual at himself for the first time ever since. And he liked it a lot, especially since he was getting a really good glimpse at the well-muscled chest and six-pack that were exposed by his open shirt. And for a dead guy, well practically un-dead guy, he looked to die for.
 
“But what about…” Jonathan hesitated, grabbing Warren and Andrew and pulling them aside. “What about our plan for the Slayer? I mean, will it work after all?”
 
“Of course it will work, since it has been my plan.” Warren answered him, putting an extra emphasis on the ‘my’ part. It had been his plan, dammit! “So we will get it started before the Slayer comes over here and finds us.”
 
“Yeah, that’s right, the Slayer will come here and find you.” Spike chimed in, causing them to jump again at the voice coming from the television and the face, identical to the still silent sitting man, growling back at them. “And then she will kick your butts for what you’ve done to me. By the way, what the bloody hell have you done to me after all?”
 
“She won’t find us and she will definitely not do anything to us. She probably is right home and doing whatever girls do there.” Warren stated calmly, ignoring the vampire. Maybe if he repeated the first part of it long enough, he too believed it.
 
***
 
Buffy was not in a good mood. She had wanted nothing more than to lay back in a really hot bath with thinking of happy thoughts and now she had to walk through the night in search of the next drugstore for the bubble bath! No, she definitely wasn’t good moody and it was all someone else’s fault. Because she didn’t know whom to blame right now, she decided to stick with an invisible someone. For the moment that should suffice. And since she also didn’t know exactly who was responsible for ordering these bottles of her special bubble bath she hadn’t found a person to replace that someone with yet.
 
The thing she knew was that this person would pay for not ordering more of these bottles to restack the supplies in the drugstore. But she still had at least two more stores to go and try her luck again in them. She would have her bubble bath this night, she simply had to!
 
Some time later, after having gone to all the drugstores in whole Sunnydale, she knew why it was called Sunnyhell by some of its inhabitants, foremost by Spike. It definitely was hell for there wasn’t a single bottle of bubble bath all over town! They had all other sorts of bubble baths, right, but none of hers! Not even a drop of it! And she would never have a bath with the wrong sort of bubble bath; they simply didn’t make the same pretty colours and bubbles in the tub.
 
Someone was going to pay for that, oh yeah! And mercy to those poor unsuspecting demons or vamps that would be facing her that night.
 
***
 
“But Warren, what has gone wrong? Because this definitely doesn’t look good to me.” Jonathan wanted to know, Andrew still repeated his mantra, having added the words ‘We will get our butts kicked’ to it.
 
“Nothing has gone wrong; all’s working fine so far.” Warren stressed the words. Nothing that he wouldn’t have anticipated had happened there; he just had to make the best out of the new situation; that was all. A how, which of course he hadn’t figured out yet. “And would you please shut Andrew up, he’s making me nervous with that whining. I need to think.”
 
“But…”


“No buts or whatever now people, is that clear?” Warren still chose to ignore the ranting vampire on the TV screen and faced his fellow Nerdians. “We had a plan, which was good by the way and still is, and we had a target. So, since we are here and the plan had worked, why don’t we get our target and make a move out of here? Preferably before the Slayer finds out what happened to her pet vampire?”
 
“Hey!”
 
“So we will take the target with us” Jonathan repeated slowly but then pointed with his fingers towards the television from where a really getting pissed off vampire glared at them. “But what about him?”
 
“Yeah, what about me? And what do you mean with taking the target with you?” Spike yelled at them. “You are not taking anything from here with you, especially not my body! Oh, god, now I’m already talking like I am no longer in my body!”
 
“Well, you aren’t.” Warren turned around and told him. “And we are taking that body with us, that’s what we came for.”
 
“But what about me?” Spike whined. “I can’t stay here in the telly for forever! I need to go back in my body so bloody undo what you’ve done!!”
 
“Why should we, we only need the body.” Warren told him, grinning evilly while doing so. “And you are just a bonus, one that sadly we don’t need right now.”
 
“You can’t do this to me!!” Spike yelled at the boy. All prospects of seeing himself forgotten, he just wanted to return to his body, sooner better than later. And maybe Buffy would be stopping by that night to get her special treat. Which would actually be a good idea, she would find them and then make them undo whatever they’d done to him. “Wait until I get out of here or better, Buffy will come here and find you, she will….”
 
“Ah, isn’t it much better with everything being silent once more.” Warren smiled towards the others, his hand still on the off-button of the television.
 
“What have you done?!” Jonathan screamed hysterically. Andrew joined him.
 
“Yeah, why did you do that?”
 
“He was getting on my nerves.” Warren explained casually, but Andrew now truly was distressed.
 
“But what about him, I mean what will happen to him now?” Andrew demanded to know. And the question truly was justified. They had no idea what would become of Spike now that he was turned off. Would he be now returning to his body after all?
 
Just that moment they heard a familiar voice from the outside of the crypt, a voice they hadn’t counted on so fast.
 
“Oh, no! Someone’s coming!”
 
***
 
So far, Buffy had dusted nearly a dozen vamps and it had only managed to relax her a little. Having had no luck at all with her bubble bath she was so desperate by now, she considered going back to the store and buying herself a different flavour of it. But one chance was still there left, she knew exactly who might have one more bottle of the bubbly stuff and thereby saving her evening, or rather night since it was fairly later by now.
 
She knew the way by heart, would have found it blindfolded in fact and that worried her slightly. Buffy shrugged the worries off, she was here on a mission, to get in, get her bubble bath lotion and get out. So, no big deal.
 
As she walked slowly over the cemetery, the one Spike resided on, she did notice the black van parked near the entrance but forgot about it quickly. All her Slayer senses were sharp and tuned onto her bubble bath stuff and they lead her directly towards his crypt.
 
The first thing she noticed when she wanted to make her usual entrance was the fact that the door already fell to the floor when she just had barely touched it. But that didn’t matter for the moment.
 
“Spike!” She shouted into the room, the light was still on, so he had to be awake. Well, of course he would be, it was night after all, normal daytime for him and the candles also still burning. Besides he was always awake when she came to him. “Where are you?”
 
She quickly checked the room, and her eyes fell upon the figure on the chair in front of the television, his eyes glued onto the television. Of course the screen was black. She grinned.
 
“Well, Spikey, haven’t paid the electricity bills, hm?” She snickered, but got no answer. He only turned his head to face her and glared at her. “Okay, I know you never pay the bills, just kidding. The actual reason for me coming here is a completely different one. And it is an emergency.”
 
Spike made a face. It had been an emergency after all that had started the whole mess in the first place. Instead he pulled her towards him the moment she had come within arm’s reach and Buffy found herself sitting in his lap in no time, his mouth nuzzling on her neck.
 
“Not that I’d mind, but I am really, really tired now.” Buffy told him, inside she thought, that it felt damn good to have him so close. She inhaled his scent and felt the butterflies inside her stomach racing. His glance told her that she could never be too tired.
 
“Well, okay, not that tired but I had a reason for coming here.” She protested weakly, it already felt relaxing to be sitting on his lap with his hands around her, holding her close. And when he finally pressed his lips gently on hers, embracing her in a sweet and tender kiss, she forgot about her fatigue or the reason she had come here in the first place. Buffy wanted the kiss to last forever, but unlike him she had to breathe.
 
Gasping for air after a particularly long kiss, she also came to her senses.
 
“I can’t do this anymore. This is wrong.” She told him, shaking her lust induced gaze off that came from sitting in his lap and turned on her heel and ran; right out of the crypt leaving a stunned looking Spike behind.
 
A Spike that still sat in the chair in front of the black television screen and hadn’t said a single word since Buffy had arrived. But of course she hadn’t noticed that, as well as she also hadn’t noticed the three Nerds who now stepped out of the shadows of the crypt where they had hidden from her.
 
“That was so cool, dude!” Andrew told Warren and he had this huge grin on his face. “How’d you do that?”
 
“Yeah, man.” Jonathan was also equally excited about it. “I mean when Buffy came in, I really thought we’re screwed, but then…that was awesome!”
 
“Simply genius, my friends.” Warren exclaimed proudly, twirling the remote control like in a Wild West movie. “That was true geniality, but not unexpected. So take a good look and learn!”
 
He pointed once more the remote towards Spike and pressed a button. Spike, who hadn’t reacted towards them at all or their short interaction, immediately stood up from the chair, obeying the command with an expressionless face. Warren’s grin spread around his whole face and he pointed with his remote at Spike, leading the vampire towards the door of the crypt by pressing the forward button on his remote control.
 
“Way cool!!” Jonathan and Andrew hovered around Warren like groupies, admiring his genius with envy on their side. “Can we also try that?”
 
Warren held onto his smile and especially onto his remote. No one of then would be getting their hands on it! It was his game for now and he enjoyed it thoroughly, overplaying the fact that he had absolutely no idea as to how it worked or why. But he wouldn’t tell that to these morons. Bathing in their admiration, he led the way out of the crypt into the night, where the van waited for them. And of course their plan, pardon his plan, was to be set in motion now that they had control over the vampire. This was going to be great after all, just like he had said it would.
 
Mission accomplished, for now.
 
***
 
Buffy was halfway home when something in her mind clicked. There had been a reason she had come to Spike and it hadn’t been for some smoochies. Of course, that had been okay also and she had enjoyed it. But Buffy had been on a mission and that hadn’t been accomplished yet. And she still wanted that bubble bath!
 
Buffy turned around and went back straight to the crypt, setting her mind on not to be seduced by Spike this time and her resolve face in place. She would not give into the sinister attraction of the vampire. Damn, he had felt so good underneath her and his lips crushing on hers…
 
Shaking these thoughts off, she entered the crypt, the door was still lying on the floor where it had fallen when she’d entered earlier. Everything still was like it had been during her previous visit not quite ten minutes ago.
 
But no Spike.
 
There was no sight of the bleached blond vampire in the whole room. That was odd, for he had been there, she was sure of it. And Buffy wasn’t that tired to be hallucinating; her sitting on his lap had been very real. At least it had felt that way, like these sensual lips on hers…
 
She was getting distracted once more. So, searching for the bubble bath, she went through his whole crypt, also looking for him. He wouldn’t miss the opportunity to make out with her, especially when she already had been there. Spike had to know that she would come back, well of course not for the bubble bath, but more for smoochies.
 
“Ah, got it!” She exclaimed triumphantly, holding a bottle of her favourite scented bubble bath lotion in her hand like it was the Holy Grail or something. With the prospect of getting that hot bubbly bath after all, she left the crypt, forgetting about the vampire but also slightly wondering about his whereabouts and why he had been so oddly silent tonight.
 
And the silent part was something, she had absolutely no explanation for.
 





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