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Chapter 5

William took a deep breath and a sip of his wine

"Ok, well but I must warn you, my life is pretty simple. I was born and raised in Manchester until I was 14, after my mum passed away me, my da and sis moved to London, where he had been offered a job at a museum.

"Your mom died? I'm so sorry, how did she. I'm sorry I don't mean to be nosy"

"Yeah, its ok she had cancer it was very long and painful so it was a relief for her, just not for the rest of us I suppose, at least the pain was over for her. So anyway as I was saying, we moved to London, it was a big shock for me and I didn't handle it very well, which resulted in me ending up with the wrong friends. My da was always too busy with work and raising us to really see what I was going through. I started to race cars for money and since it wasn't exactly legal the pay was good. I became known as Spike.

"Spike? Sounds like you were a bad boy?"

"Oh I was, well at least that's what I was trying to pretend to be, I had the whole punk act going, the hair, eyeliner, black nails, black leather. I guess you could say I was a rebel. I thought I didn't need anyone, least of all my da, I really hated all that he stood for. We never really got along, I was a mother's boy. She always understood me, so after she was gone there wasn't a lot left between me and my father. I was planning on making enough money to move out, all I cared about was my music. Oh yeah I had a band, we really thought we would actually make it, that we were the next Stones. Anyway one night I was supposed to race, but my da held me at the house longer we had an argument and I was late, by the time I got there my best friend was already in my place, I was so mad at my father, that was a big race there was a lot of money involved, with that money I was going to finally buy my own car. But things happened for a reason and that night that argument with my da, saved my life. Chris died that night on a car accident, apparently the brakes were cut by someone who didn't want us to win, again there was a lot of money involved."

"Oh my God, that must have been terrible"

"Yes he died right in front of me. I was so shocked that I never heard the police came of course by the time they got there, everybody was gone so they arrested me, while I was at the police car I saw the ambulance taking Chris's dead body, and all I could think was that that should have been me. I spend the night in jail, until my da came to pick me the next morning. I changed that night and from that they on I decided to listen to my da, and it turned not so bad. I graduated, went to college got a good job, married a nice girl and finally divorced and moved to sunny California"

Buffy was speechless his confession had really touched her, she wanted to hug him so much, but she was still afraid.

"That was quite a story but I still don't get something?"

"What's that pet?"

"You said your life was simple. And to me it sounds everything but simple"

"Well it's all a matter of perspective luv. Quit pro quo pet, how about you finish your story and tell me how did you ended up in the divorce club?"

"Oh I'm not divorced"

"But you told me you weren't married anymore."

"I know, I'm not divorced I'm a widow. After Riley left I found out that I was pregnant, it was hard because I really didn't have anyone to share that with, he was gone and since it was a big top mission I had no way to know where he was or when would he be back. Until one day I got a letter saying that Agent Finn had died bravely in action, I was devastated I was alone and pregnant. The funeral was simple and discrete, like in the movies a flag as handed to me, but no one would tell me how did it happened, I don't even know if it was his body inside the coffin in front of me. His parents blame me for his death, they think I was the reason he didn't go to Princeton they didn't even care that I was caring their grandchild. They told me that I was nothing but a gold digger but that I wasn't going to see a dime, they didn't want see me anymore. Thank God we got married before or I would have ended being alone pregnant and on the streets." Tears were running down her cheeks.

Spike couldn't help but to hug her and pat her back. She felt so fragile in his arms, he wanted to protected her so bad.

"Shhh pet is ok, look how well things turned out for you, Sarah is a wonderful girl, you were so brave"

"Not really" As she broke the hug

"What do you mean?"

"Well after Riley's funeral I was a mess I barely ate. I realized that I couldn't bring a child to this world, I wasn't in any condition to raise a baby I was 19 years old, with no education what could I possibly had to offer to that baby. So I decided that I was going to do the best thing I could for him, I was going to find her the best family I could, so I investigated which was the best agency and decided to give my baby up for adoption. It made sense at the time, I could go back to school and my baby would have the family it deserved. I interviewed over 10 couples, I wanted a real home were they would love her. That's when I met Willow and Xander"

"Harris? The block I met earlier?"

"Yes, him and Xillow weren't able to conceive, so they were looking forward to adopt a baby. I love them instantly, they were so nice, caring and funny they weren't the wealthiest couple but that wasn't my priority I knew they could provide my baby with all I wanted him to have. I moved back to California to be closer to them and enrolled myself at college so I could begin school soon after the baby was born. The more I got to know the Xander and Will, the more I felt I was making the right choice, but the Sarah was born and the minute I set my eyes on her I knew I couldn't do it, she was so tiny and perfect, she was a part of me. So I decided to take a chance and keep her. I broke Xander's and Will's heart, but deep inside they understood, not long after that Willow realized she was pregnant I guess they had they own little miracle too. We remained good friends they are Sarah's godparents and my only family. Willow helped me get the teaching job, which it works great for me, I get to see Sarah, it's a part time job and I love it." Buffy finished

"May I ask you a question pet?"

"Sure"

"Do you ever regret your decision?"

"Yes and no. When it comes to me never, I love Sarah more than anything in the world, I can't imagine my life with out her. But sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice for her, if she wouldn't be better of with a real family in a real home"

"Buffy honey, in case you haven't notice she has a family and a home, a very good one if you ask me."

"Thanks, I try"

"I have to say that I admire you luv, you are a hell of a woman" A he said that he knew he couldn't resist any longer, he had to kiss her, so he began leaning and when he didn't find any resistance he went for it kissing her softly on the lips. She tasted so sweet, her lips were soft and felt like made for him.

Buffy wanted for him to kiss her so badly, she hadn't realized it until tonight, she had blocked out how lonely she really was and how much she needed a shoulder to cry on and someone to share her life with. When William finally made a move she couldn't move, he seemed perfect for her, she couldn't remember anybody ever making her feel this way. His kiss was so sweet. Usually guys jumped right into hungry kisses that could lead to bed.

They were still kissing went suddenly they heard a little voice behind them

"Mommy" As Sarah

"Sarah baby what's wrong?" Buffy managed to say as she jumped back pushing William away.

"I'm thirsty" in a demanding voice.

"Honey there's a glass of water right beside your bed" As she stood up and went to her

"But I want juice" in a whining voice

Normally Buffy would had never given in to her demands, but in this case she decided to give her a little juice, so she could go back to bed.

After 5 minutes she finally was able to put her back to sleep. She came back and embarrassed she look at William, who was waiting for her.

"I'm sorry, parenthood is a 24/7 job. I didn't mean to push you like that. I'm so sorry I panicked"

"Don't worry luv, I understand. But don't do it again ok?" he said with a sexy smile on his face

"Again? What does that supposed to mean?" she said blushing

"There's more were this came from. I like you Buffy I really mean it. I want to get to know you better, I felt a connection tonight that I would love to explore further, if you let me"

"I felt too, I haven't talked like this to anyone. Thank you for listening William. But I need time, can we take it slow?"

"Of course, how about we do this properly, and tomorrow you let me take you out on a date?"

"A date?" she said looking surprised

"Yes a date, you know dinner and a movie and a kiss at the end of it"

"Sounds lovely. What time?" Smiling at him

"Pick you up at 7:30. Now I better get going now that I can still be a gentleman"

"Ok, I walk you out. I'll see you tomorrow and again thanks for listening"

"No luv, thank you for a lovely evening. I can't wait for tomorrow. Sweet dreams pet" As he lean to kiss her once more softly on the lips.

"Bye" she whispered as she closed the door. She suddenly felt a tear running down her cheek, but this time it was full of happiness and hope.




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